Sunday, February 17, 2013
We Do It To Ourselves
So here's a rerun from my enchanted 40's. :)
I'm still thinking about the movie, Little Manhattan (see my post below).
In one scene, Gabe wonders, just by looking across the karate classroom at Rosemary's face, if Rosemary is mad at him for something he did. Her lips smile a little, and Gabe happily thinks, "She loves me!" But then she turns, frowns just a tad and he fears, "Darn. She loves me not." Gabe's anxious, worried mind goes back and forth and back and forth--she loves me, she loves me not--just by trying to read Rosemary's teensiest facial movements.
Good gracious. Did that ever bring back memories of a few decades' worth of torturing myself by trying to second-guess people, instead of just applying good ol' communication.
We do it to ourselves. Way too often we torture ourselves.
We wonder if people are mad at us, yet we're afraid to simply ask. Or we go ahead and ask, and then doubt or analyze the answer if it was, "No, I'm not mad at you."
...or we base how we feel about ourselves upon how others treat us, when it would have been much better to just ask God, "How do you feel about me today?"
... or we allow fear to make us sick or even paralyzed instead of holding onto childlike faith that God is still God and He's still big enough to take care of us and our children, family and friends.
... or we stop loving ourselves if someone else stops loving us instead of remembering, always, we have a friend in God--the lover of our souls.
Probably most often we believe other people are tormenting us, when sadly, most of the time we, ourselves, are allowing anxious, torturing thoughts to spin and spin inside our aching heads.
Perhaps this is partly why I am loving my 40's. On most days, I no longer torture myself, no longer analyze people and things to death or give myself headaches by trying to run my own life or--even worse-- the whole world.
I've learned that in wanting God more than anything else, I can have what I want most, for God always answers that prayer. So I need not throw another hissy fit, ever.
There was a better way all along, but it wasn't until this late decade that I discovered it... and oh, how good Life feels now.
"'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind'..." ... Luke 10:27
Just a reminder... There are free Grace Livingston Hill books for your Kindle here.
Please pray for Tom... He hurt his back badly enough this morning that he won't be able to return to work tonight. Thanks.