Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Uh-Oh. It's Finally Here.

"There is a friend who sticks closer than a brother." Proverbs 18:24

Oh, and "This, too, shall pass."


Oh man. 

Poor ol' Debra thinks she's (finally) having a mid-life crisis.

No, really.

This past week I've felt aimless, helpless (mostly regarding fixing what bugs me about this house, or even, being able--physically, mentally--to move ever again), not to mention being moody and disgruntled (about who-knows-what?), so much so, that Tom majorly got upset with me (my attitude/tone) on Sunday.


Yesterday I read online symptoms of a mid-life crisis and gee, I've got many. One writer even said, "Do not make any major decisions during this time," but hey! Where's the fun in that? 


Besides, part of me believes a mid-life crisis can be a signal that something is wrong, needs changing. Like, if you've always wanted to do/be something or go somewhere--perhaps now is the time to make those plans. You know, before it's too late.

It's not getting any earlier, after all.

I told Tom perhaps I need to stay a few days in a motel. I can't seem to get enough time alone lately and how luxurious would it be to lie around a pretty room all day? You know, watching HGTV, staring out the window or soaking in the tub and not ironing, watering the yard or feeding the cats? He seemed very open to this idea. Said he'd make all the arrangements. I could go anywhere.

Uh-oh. After awhile I teased him about wanting to get rid of me. Funny, he barely denied that. 

Then last night just as I felt better while picturing myself in the motel down the street on our beautiful river, Sally's granddaughter's husband knocked on the door and said they'd had to put Buddy, the sweetest dog on earth, down. He'd kept getting infections since becoming partially paralyzed.

Oh my goodness. Buddy's sweet face and demeanor (and the sadness) kept waking my mind all night. Tom and I had so enjoyed watching Sue and Buddy sitting outside on a picnic blanket lately, Buddy guaging breezes with this long, cute nose, looking like, "Life is still so good, after all."

Oh dear. I may take a few days off from blogging. Or not. As I said, I've just wanted to be alone lately (more than usual), for I'm deciding what I really want/need, and what I must release (or accept) so to keep from dreaming about what's not mine to have in the future. 

I asked God if I could skip confessing all this, but He reminded me that it's not right to just disappear from your blog without an explanation, nor is it good to pretend all is well. Plus, He's big on vulnerability--I know this.

So there you go.

But don't worry, ok? It's not like a few bazillion other people haven't gone through this before. Also, I feel fine physically. Well, except for my usual brought-it-on-myself out-of-shapeness, which yes, would be a terrific thing to tackle now, too. Besides, I'm spending less time online--who needs to read more bad news at a time like this? 

Yet as always, it's one day and one moment at a time, each while sitting beside the Best Friend on the planet. And that can never be too bad of a thing at all.

“Evelyn stared into the empty ice cream carton and wondered where the smiling girl in the school pictures had gone.” 
― Fannie Flagg


I appreciated this from Facebook this morning:

From Brenda Allie Flom:

I know we all get angry and frustrated about the chaos going on in our nation right now. I know we are all sick of the corruption and lies. I also know we have a ginormous God who's got this. Some of the things that are spoken by believers verbally or by FB actually contradict this. The statements of late are proposing an itty bitty God and a ginormous devil. They are cursing doom and gloom over the land.
Let's start speaking from the heart of our Father and not the heart of our flesh. Let's repent for our emotions that have brought curses and instead, speak blessings of life, peace, protection, righteousness, unity, love and restoration over our nation.
God sees it all, He wants our praise, prayers and decrees. He wants us to take a stand as sons. He wants His ecclesia to rise up and take their place in the authority He has given us, instead of joining in with the worldly negative mindset.
Let's start today. Let's start NOW."


Did you see this scary film of Jay Leno's car crash? Yikes!



Monday, June 27, 2016

Just In Case You're Different---

"To put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness."   ...Ephesians 4:22-24


Saturday was hot, I was wilting, but on a bench at a yard sale, I spied a 1948 yearbook from the high school (now middle school) down the street.

Always when driving or walking past, I imagine that suddenly it's 1940 (or 1950) and 'see' teens standing out front in all their vintage clothing finery, holding books and laughing. And now I have actual faces to attach to those spiffy clothes:

                  (Don't you love the obvious movie star influence?)

These 'kids' (who are still living) will turn 86 this year(!) On the more somber side, I spent Sunday afternoon finding obituaries online for those who've left us.

I've many genealogical-minded friends who positively love researching their own relatives from long ago. Me? Eh. I never do that. I prefer looking up strangers online from old yearbooks. 

(Oh, the scandal, right?)

People tell me I should care more about my family tree and how--by learning that Great-Great Aunt Matilda was a quirky eccentric--it will help me understand my own eccentricities. Or because Uncle Ichabod was an introverted writer I can then understand why I'm one.

Hmm. Well, maybe. 

But what I know? For the past 22 years (especially) God has poured His heart into making me more like Him. He's shown me how to better use my gifts and helped tear down the tall, dreadful structure inside which I'd built unto myself.

And He's had a rough time of it. Trust me.

So basically, all credit for any good within me goes--first--to God. Second, to the wonderful teachers He arranged for me, not just teacher-teachers, but to each of you (and others) who've helped round my unbending, like-concrete corners. 

Anyway, we're all different--and that's ok. It's ok if you love genealogy and it's ok that I, instead, collect old yearbooks, stare at the faces and imagine how these teens lived and loved. That, online, I spend hours discovering what I can.

We cannot all go to the same places. Life would be too limited, boxy, that way--there were reasons for the Tower of Babel departure, after all.

Personally I come from a long line of folks who believe there's only one way to think and be. And truthfully? The Internet has played a huge part in setting me free from that. The Internet and God and Grace and you.

And to all of you I say, thanks.


"Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come."  ... 2 Corinthians 5:17


Yesterday I was saddened to read that Jackie Burroughs (Aunt Hetty) of Road to Avonlea passed away back in 2010. Tom thinks I already knew this, but if I did, I'd forgotten--and felt bad all over again.

I can't even explain how much I loved this show. The stories, the characters, the Victorian decor, the clothes, the hair and----- 

Well, here's a short Youtube video of interviews on set during their final year.

I'm thinking it's time to get out my Avonlea dvd's again. It's been a few years.


Thursday, June 23, 2016

Like A Birthday in June

So if you who are evil know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!   ... Matthew 7:11


Owning only around 100 vintage Scholastic books, I felt I needed more (More. Must. Have. More.) so I went to Ebay where these tempted me like crazy:

Just a $4 opening bid and not one was a duplicate of what I've already stuffed upon my shelves. Rare, that.

But I wanted to be sensible, spend less with my credit card this month, so I thought, "I'll just bid the $4. That's it. If someone else bids higher, they can take them."

Time passed (as it will), I forgot what I'd done (as I do), and when I received a You-Won! email, I thought, "Huh? What did I win?" Then I opened it. And remembered.


Don't you love it when that happens? Already out upon our summery front porch I've read Irma's Big Lie, High Country Adventure and Jenny, Sam and the Invisible Hildegarde and well, they were awesome. How soothing, peaceful, to read retro kids' novels while a hectic, confused world swirls around me.

Now, don't laugh but it's felt like a birthday and Christmas and as though God smiled while He nudged me over to Ebay that day.   

Yes, He knows me that well and I matter to Him that much. And so do you.


“...You say to God, “I have never seen you provide for me.” 
God says to you, “You have never trusted Me.” 
― Corallie Buchanan

 “Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God.” 
― Corrie ten Boom

“God loves you so much that he is willing to hold something from you for the perfect time!” 
― Rachel Hamilton


Okay, only some of you will enjoy this, so for you, here you go:

List of People Who Disappeared Mysteriously

Last week I must have been in just the right mood, for I found it fascinating reading.


Here's a beautiful song by Lenny LeBlanc that some of you will love.

"When you have history with God, remembering what He’s done, you don’t get discouraged by every difficulty. You know God brought you through in the past, and He’ll bring you through in the future."  ... Joel Osteen