Saturday, September 17, 2011

Just Thinking Aloud

It was silent and grey when I left the house around 8 a.m. this morning.

I was heading out to our former town, the countryside one, so to pick up a prescription for Tom at our old pharmacy (he's not switched to a new one yet, there's some kind of time factor involved). But Tom needed me to drive out there because he got no sleep last night. He has a stomach flu (we think) and his back/arm have been messed up since we moved here and the pain keeps him awake, even after having had both a chiropractor adjustment then a therapeutic massage.

All this came after his bout with the heat exhaustion thing for the first 30 hours we lived here. I am loving our new home and Tom would love it, too, if only he could feel better! But mostly he's been in his recliner watching tv and watching me unpack--which I've not minded at all, actually. The watching part, I mean. He'd only get caught in my decorating whirlwind otherwise, though in all the whirlwind, there's been a sadness to see him in that chair.

And may this serve as a reminder--no one has a perfect life. No one. Each person you know has at least one custom-made trial to contend with. Whether they speak of it or not, it's there. We all have something.

But already I'm experiencing one of those times when I'm grateful we have only a small home and yard--both which I can care for alone if I have to. And I've had to a lot these past two weeks-- Tom has been that laid-up. But the days these sorts of things happened out at the farm? Oh, they used to worry me, for I knew I could never care for those four acres alone if the need arose. We did have two extremely helpful neighbors (and thanked God for them often), but it's a hard thing to keep asking them for help, even when they always seemed happy to do so.

Anyway, back to this morning. The roads were quiet as I drove back to the ol' farm town, a route I'd never driven alone before. (Can you believe that in the more than three years we lived out there, I probably drove our car just fifteen times?). Then when I finally arrived upon the main street of our former tiny town, well, I got a bit misty-eyed. That sweet little place where people greeted us like friends wherever we went! Ah, I've missed that. I've not missed our farm, only that friendly, tiny-town feeling.

And then as I walked out of Rite-Aid with Tom's prescription (still a bit teary) I reminded myself that these past two weeks I've been so at home. Haven't even taken one walk yet. Only a couple trips to the supermarket. Haven't gone out of my way to meet more neighbors (we did meet a few).

We're still so new here! And there's plenty of time to get to know the people of our new town. We already know our way around, having shopped here for years (something I've loved doing since 1993, even, the year we moved to New York). But a town is much more than it's stores, just as a church is much more than its building. Mostly, a town is its people. And that is why I missed our former country town this early morning--it was the memories of all those sweet greetings and smiles over the years.

And so to offset that, it's the people here in our new place that I'll need to open up to and get to know. They will make it feel like home. They will make me (even more) grateful to live within the borders of this new place. The getting to know them, their smiles and greetings yet to come.


Any prayers for Tom would be deeply appreciated. Thanks so much.

He's scheduled for more injections into his back on Monday. They usually relieve a lot of pain.



Judy said...

Blessings to you Debra! And prayers for Tom.
I'm so excited to get to know your NEW home and town.

Kristi in the Western Reserve said...

I'm praying for Tom! And for both of you as you settle into your new cozy home and enjoy nest building...Debra, my dr. has given me two kinds of patches for the arthritis pain in my knees and shoulder. I'm just testing one at a time, but already I can see they help. One is lidoderm and it's like lidacaine that dentists use, but topically applied to the area that hurts. Another is an NSAID and can't be used in connection with any other, and I haven't tried it yet. Just got these samples from the dr. on Friday. (Oh, yesterday! It feels like long ago!) Perhaps you could see if Tom could use something like this sometimes....Anyway, just a thought. I wouldn't have known about these if my cousin - a nurse - hadn't told me she was using them for arthritis in her knees.

You will get to know your neighbors soon, and you known more than anyone that you are never alone!

Blu-I'd-Blonde said...

This made me think of the Girl Scout's Motto: "Make new friends and keep the old, one is silver and the other gold."

You'll be in my prayers.

Morning's Minion said...

Having moved quite a few times in 48 years of married life, I know that sense of not yet belonging in the new place, yet no longer a real part of the former home. I think the excitement and the exhaustion of the moving process serves to carry one through the first transition time. Then there comes a sort of a bump--the time of adjustment when we need to rest if we can, start to settle in and get acquainted.
I'm sorry your Tom is contending with physical ills. For some of us a degree of pain is chronic and we live with it the best we can--but never fun to have it flare up just because we've had to be busier than usual.
You've made the little house look so nice already. Hopefully you and Tom will both be enjoying it fully very soon.
[And will you go looking for a cat or two or will you wait for the cat[s] to 'find' you?]

Anonymous said...

Prayers for Tom...chronic pain is so hard to deal with!! I was able some years ago, to get most of mine cut out...but now comes along getting older and "arthur" (arthritis)...but at least for me it is still not constant, and I am grateful.

I have been using a cream called FIRM made by the Mannetech company. Moreso as the years roll along. We find it helps with a lot of types of pain, tho' not all for everyone. But it is made from wild yams and other natural stuff. Lately I have had a patch of skin with trouble (thought it was fungal, or maybe needed some vitamin E...the E helped but the best of all and it is now healing up, is the FIRM cream). So far using the FIRM cream keeps me from using internal meds for my arthritis. And no, I do not sell it...tho' maybe after hubby retires I might think on that more...we love that product more than anything else the company sells, to our knowledge at this time.

I hope you can find a way to help Tom...sometimes we have to be kind of our own doctors. Sometimes natural things can help even more than the perscription stuff.
Elizabeth in NC

Anonymous said...

I agree with Morning's Minion's point of view and I think moving is quite an emotional ordeal and it takes awhile for your body and soul and spirit to get to your new place. I don't know if you understand what I mean. What I mean to say is that you don't get there all at once, you get there at your new place, little by little and it takes time and one day you'll be in your house or your garden or just having dinner with Tom and you'll think...yeah....all of me is finally here.
I'll keep Tom in my prayers.


Dolores Lynn said...

Ahhh, poor Tom, I hope he feels better soon.