Sunday, March 19, 2006

The Annoying Little Fact About How I Act At Home...




Years ago, I was taught that each of us are only as spiritual--as loving, patient and like Jesus--as we are in our own homes. As we behave with the people who know us best.

Bummer.

At first, my mind rebelled against that thought. My brain reminded me of all the 'important work' I'd done, all the Bible classes I'd taught, people I'd counseled, all the encouraging letters I snail-mailed every month and the long Bible passages I read each day. 

I longed, instead, to believe all those were proof of how spiritual I really had become.

But pretty fast, I knew that the teacher had been indeed, correct. I saw it, suddenly, like a lowest common denominator sort of thing. Remember those dreadful math exercises from elementary school? Well, once again I saw them as dreadful because I realized--with moaning--that my often-pathetic behavior toward Tom and Naomi (and various other relatives) was the lowest common denominator which brought down, lowered, the bright, overly-rated picture I had of my own spiritual standing. 

Oh dear.

Of course, this is a little hard to explain, and I can only hope you're getting my overall meaning. I'm not talking about being good so I'll get into Heaven (heaven forbid), nor am I talking about 'works,'necessarily, or earning or deserving favor by my own good deeds.

No, I'm talking about letting Jesus speak, walk and live through me. 

And well, I have only died to self and allowed Him to change me and take over to the extent of how I live that out around people who know me best. 

It's impossible for me to be more holy, spiritual, kind--in reality--than I am in my own home. Ain't gonna happen.

I hope that makes sense, for God used that one realization to humble me or phrased another way-- to deflate me flat as a pancake.

It was, and still is, a Good Thing.


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"But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves." James 1:22


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