Tuesday, May 31, 2005
Milton asked this question after my post, Living The Dream:
"...At the risk of sounding flippant, I'll ask a serious question: Are your dreams as dreamy as you dreamed they would be?"
...and it's been on my mind since that day. What a great question!
And my answer? Most of my dreams-come-true are even dreamier than I'd dreamed them as a gleaming-eyed girl.
This is something I'd not thought of before. The majority of my dreams/ambitions/goals required some flexibility on my part for me to reach them. Why? Because in my own finite mind in my early, naive years, I did not account for the fact that I would be growing and changing along the way. And we are talking big changes here.
But God knew. He saw ahead when I couldn't. So only by being pliable and walking where He led me could I get here now.
No wonder I felt stuck in one place for so long--my stubbornness held me there. I kept seeing myself in the grand Victorian house my 17-year-old mind beheld, so I was blind to the fact that my tastes had changed along the years. In my 40's, I actually prefer the woods and colors of the Craftsman style of my own home. I actually love the 1930's flavor of this house much better than the 1880's cluttered taste of Victoriana. But I couldn't see it until I let go of the Victorian House dream.
And the books I saw myself writing in the future? This blog is my "letter to the world." Only God could have seen thirty years ago that I'd love the instant rapport with my readers online much better than the delayed reaction if I were to write a book. At least, that is how I feel right now. Perhaps in the future this will change, too.
I had dreams of having many children, yet in these later years, I found that one was just perfect for me. At 17 I saw myself living next to the ocean, but at 46 I know for certain I could never handle all the fog--it would depress me.
And on and on.
So yes, Milton, my fleshed-out dreams have turned out even dreamier than I had dreamed. And I thank God for tweaking my dreams and not always letting me get what I thought I wanted.
Too bad I kicked and pouted a whole lot along the way.
Too bad I'm only just now discovering Father really does know best.
Choose a dream, but give yourself--and your dream--room to grow.
"A man's mind plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps and makes them sure." Proverbs 16:9