Actually? The 'regular people's cable tv'--in some ways--has proved helpful.
How? Well, Tom's watching all those kitties and puppies has helped him realize, firmly, that he loves animals and perhaps he'd enjoy volunteering at our local animal shelter. And with his love of learning about history, also, maybe he could develop a hobby/job/club around that.
Whew! I was so relieved to hear that because for all these 15 months of his joblessness, Tom's not been able to figure out what to do next. What he loves or makes him tick (as they say). Well, besides guitars and amplifiers, he loves those. And music. And football.
See, I believe that as with tons and tons of men and women who work full-time then hit retirement, Tom was so busy with his job all those years, working 12-hour days, that he never had (or never took) the time to develop other interests or callings or talents, though he did sing and play the guitar beautifully until he stopped a decade ago and doesn't wish to start back up.
And the same thing often happens to moms who build their lives around their children. When the (adult) children fly away from the nest, silence! Suddenly there's too much quiet and the daily goals and visions fade away and the shock of it all has paralyzed many a terrific mom.
That sort of "stay busy, busy, busy so you don't have time to know who you really are" can sink the best of us.
But how to rise above it? I would say start asking questions:
"What do I love to do? To watch? To read?
What kind of music do I like best?
Where do I enjoy spending time?
If I could travel anywhere, where would that be?
What kinds of injustices in the tv news make my blood boil?
What are my favorite colors?
Do I have any hobbies?
With whom do I enjoy spending time?
What kinds of conversations make me feel vitally alive?
If I could go back to college, what would I enjoy studying?
If I could have any job, what would it be?
What would I need to do first in order to acquire that job? Can I begin in a small way today to succeed?"
And more.
Basically? I feel too many people reach their mid-40's or 50's without knowing who it is God designed them to be. Somehow they've spent whole decades unacquainted with--and avoiding-- themselves.
And for them I would say--it's never too late to discover who you really are. Today would be a marvelous day to begin the search, the exciting journey.
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Speaking of hobbies, for, like, forever I've collected wheat-back pennies. Oh, not in a hoarding, obsessive, wild-eyed sort of way, but for decades whenever I've found a wheat-back penny I've kept it and placed it here:
Someday I'll do research then sit down and peer at them to see if any are worth anything more than 1 cent. I'd better do it quickly before my over-40 eyes rebel anymore than they already have (oh, the small writing!).
Which reminds me, a couple weeks ago I discovered this article about how lots of people are hoarding pennies made in 1982 and earlier. If a certain law passes, they'll be able to melt them down for the copper and make oodles of money. How fun! That inspired me to paw through our two largish change containers so I could separate the pre-1983 pennies from all the rest and I'm nearly finished doing so (Tom helped me a bit).
Just thought I'd share my penny hobby with you for fun.
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3 comments:
Only have a minute but wanted to make sure you knew that some of the coin machines you can instead of getting cash can convert your money into an account with Amazon. Just mentioning it in case that is something you'd like. No pay pal or such to go through that way to order off Amazon. See Ya later...Sarah
Sarah--oh! That does sound interesting. I'll definitely look into it--thanks! ... Debra
I will direct people that are nearing retirement to this post. They are already wondering what to do with all those empty hours after their work life is over. That is how they would put it..not how I would put it. We stumbled on what we do by just talking to some people and they needed help and we were off and doing things every week to volunteer in our little area! We got new friends, exercise and knowledge of the politics and history of our area as well. We are also working towards even more independence in more gardening, preserving and such now. I am sure the future could hold different or more experiences but we are ready to embrace them! Like all of life, life is what you make it. It does not come knocking on your door...you have to go out and embrace your share of it. It is hard though to think past the box you were in if you worked for a living all our life. Thanks for the information! :) Sarah
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