Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Sometimes That's Just Life

I'd gone to my best friend's house after school one afternoon and we decided to make brownies (I think), so she began pulling measuring cups and spoons out of a kitchen drawer. I saw that the assorted metal and plastic cups, some of them anyway, still had dustings of flour and sugar upon them from previous uses. I asked Tara about that and she smiled and said, "Oh, my mom only sometimes washes the ones we've used with dry ingredients. I mean, you're just going to use them for the same thing, so why wash them every single time?"

Why indeed? That made perfect sense to me, and for reasons which cannot be explained, I told myself on that afternoon, at age 16, that when I grew-up I, too, would have a drawer with floury and sugary measuring cups and spoons inside. I guess it sounded cozy. Romantic. Domestically sensual. (Who understands these things really?) And I believed that my future daughter, like Tara, would think it was a cozy thing to do, too, and she'd smile, as Tara had, because her mother kept her measuring cups in this way.

So I did. But my daughter didn't. Smile about the floury measuring cups, that is. No, instead, she'd wrinkle her nose and lecture me about washing things before putting them away.

Sometimes that's just Life.

And sometimes it's just Life when you collect a ton of your favorite, much-loved books to share with your daughter, but she's not a big fan of reading (saying she burned-out in the 1st grade when, for a class contest, she read 300 books. Out loud. To me.)...

... or you're careful to latch your storm door every single time (when others in your family forget frequently), but the ONE time you do forget, a strong wind blows, pulls the screws from the door frame, and your husband lectures you about the necessity of closing the storm door securely Every Time...

... or you get serious, really serious, about losing weight--and then it hits you--Thanksgiving is just one week away...

... or your appliances never break down one at a time, but always in rebellious groups...

... or when you think your husband will be mad at you, he isn't... But when you have no clue he'll be mad, he is.

Need I go on? Nah, I didn't think so.

There are many things which are, well, Just Life. And I am learning not to waste my good energy with bad thoughts and frustrations and prayers and campaigns to try to change those Just Life things. I'm learning to ask God what needs to be changed because only those are the things I'll receive His help in changing. With all the rest I'm on my own. And there is no scarier, more wasteful, more futile place to be than on my own.

That's just Life.

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