Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Seeking Book Recommendations


Ok, so here's an easier question. :)

Can any of you recommend great books for newly-widowed women? I think my mom would appreciate something very practical and upbeat. You know, a book filled with ideas of what to do now and how to accept and discover a fulfilling new life.

If you know of books like that geared more for empty-nesters, that could be ok, too. It would be good to have a list in my comment box for both widows and empty-nesters of quality resources.

I'd really appreciate your help. My mom is doing well, all things considered, but I think she'd benefit from anything which can encourage her to make the most of this new phase of her life. True, she's still in the grieving stages, but I'd love for her to be able to anticipate the future and view it filled with potential.

Thanks!

5 comments:

Kristi in the Western Reserve said...

Hi Debra, I think I should be able to answer this question but I really can't suggest a book which even I entirely was satisfied with and I don't want to suggest anything that would be against your mother's religious beliefs. That said, A Buddhist book called Mindful Grieving helped me. Some parts of a book called Widow to Widow helped me. (Other parts almost offended me.) I read lots of other books from our library when Paul first died, and some were better than others. I think my family and some local support groups were best. I have a financial advisor and I also have seen a therapist a few times - he's someone my doctor recommended because she thought he was good. Some are not helpful....There is a lot of online stuff about grieving and a site called mindpub.com/art042.htm is one page of many others about grieving. This one is called How long Does Active Grieving Last....But I am not sure if this is what you wanted to suggest for your mother....Grieving takes a long time - probably about two years, many say, to get back to feeling normal. I have found structuring my life around exercise at the Natatorium, some art classes, visits to children and grandchildren some activities at church and taking life one day at a time are best. I plan to become involved in volunteer work again, but don't feel quite ready for this....Life continues. Why don't you email me offblog....

Willa said...

Yes, I need the same thing for my mom - we just lost dad the day after Christmas. My mom is doing pretty well, too, but she needs to explore and know that she is still viable and can have a fulfilling life.

I would love a book like that too.

Lyn said...

Debra:
I have a blog on the Seattle pi about 40+ women and just started posts about young widows.
Mel is my daughter. I doubt if life will ever be the same for her, but she's working on it.
Elaine Williams sent me an ARC copy of her book A Journel Well Taken to review. The first part is kind of heavy..dealing with his death. The second part is about her search for a new life. I'll be doing a couple of posts on her and hope to have some feedback from her. Someone else asked if they could write about war widows, so I'll be doing that, too. Would you or your mother like to do a couple?
Lyn Harris
lynharris520@gmail.com

http://blog.seattlepi.nwsource.com/lynscircle/archives/134162.asp
(The Google ID is for my New Zealand blog)

... Paige said...

I wish I knew of some good reads. Perhaps if she were to pick up a hobby she has let wane or maybe get a new one she has always wanted to try but hasn't.

Be safe

Valerie - Still Riding said...

The change from being part of a loving "us" back to being a loving "me" again is hard.

I offer http://4herway.com/4letterword/index.html

and my blog http://forwardho.blogspot.com/
It starts Jan 06 on the blog.

I can only say I am still here, loving on - alone, for now - and waiting to see what comes next.

It's not always easy, but I am making it.

There is God and joy and fun in life again, most of the time.

The balance has shifted to more good times than bad this year.

Each one left behind for how has their own way to find.

All I can offer is I have done it and believe they can, too.