Well, things just keep getting better and better around here. arghh.
Tom had an MRI last week and he just came home and told me the results. He has a six-inch long water-filled cyst in his spine (a spine which resembles a roller coaster due to his having had polio, etc.) and around 5 ruptured discs, as well. The doctor said no surgery is needed now, but someday--
Never before in our life have we faced so many tests at once. Most of me at this moment is wanting Tom to retire so we can just buy a little homestead in some state where it doesn't snow, or have hurricanes or tornadoes and where real estate is still sane (anyone have any suggestions?). And then hide away from the world and grow a garden, raise chickens and goats and a dog. And then see that Tom gets retrained for something less strenuous. Or maybe have a bed-and-breakfast inn. Or a guitar shop (we had one once) with a little book nook.
Or all of the above.
I keep telling Tom that lots of people do that everyday. Many folks make such huge changes around age 50. But when I have him almost convinced he keeps coming back to what about medical insurance for all the future surgeries he will need? What about how expensive it is when you're not getting insurance through your job? (I wish he'd check out other forms and types of insurance. Some people have found sane companies which are not through their employer. Guess I'll have to check it out myself.)
Anyway.
Any prayers would be appreciated. And any creative ideas, also, in my comment box. I'm open to just about anything at this moment. We'll just have to pray that Tom will be open to the right thing, too, whatever that right thing may be.
As of this moment, I have no idea.
***
P.S. Tom's doctors told him they'd help him get on disability--they said there should be no real problem with his (very real) case. Tom sees that on the horizon--he'd just rather it not be this soon.
******
14 comments:
Wow Debra. Can't they take care of it now and get it over with before it becomes a problem for him?
Robin---well, actually, it would be major surgery and right now the risks aren't worth it since it's not a major problem for him. Also, any time you mess around with the discs, there's always a chance the discs below them will then have a problem. He's already had two surgeries on two discs...sigh... His is a unique case and the doctors don't know quite what to do with him. Thanks for asking, though! :) Debra
Those are hard words to hear from a doctor. Nelson really struggled with the whole disability thing after his ankle injury. He's in so much pain...it's hard to watch some days. I'm so thank-full for grace!
Dear Lady , Hard struggles and battles that fray the nerve. We looked into doing something else as well and found the same problem with the insurance sky high on our own 200. per month verses over 1400. and less quality of choices.
He needs to know from God that he can "cut it as a man" down to the core men need that.
Disability is a real wound to the soul of a man. Perhaps a job shift of department relocation.
We looked at relocation and found that every place has it's own challenges. We choose to stay ere in Arizona. Hot summers hard to garden but great health care and pay.
To every decision there will be pros and cons.
I have no creative ideas but I will pray.
I understand his concerns about the insurance. I pray I don't loose my job because of the Med. insurance coverage we have to have and will not be able to get anywhere else. Cancer does that to your coverage-ablty.
If you can find and get coverage elsewhere you may want to do that, hopefully they will coverage any diagnosis already made (sometimes they don't cover pre-existing)
Wow.
I wish it didn't snow in Michigan.
I think you would love it here.
You and Tom are much in my prayers.
(((Debra & Tom)))
I have family who moved to Camden, TN, and love it there. No state income tax, low property taxes, friendly people. There are still some places left where it doesn't cost a small fortune to buy a nice home. Where I live is not one of them however.
Hope and pray that things work out well for you and your DH.
If disability would put Tom on medicare, early, it might be an answer. You already seem to know how to live frugally.
Prayers and good wishes to you both.
Ack! I'm sorry to hear about Tom's back, and I'll be praying for you both. Washington State doesn't get a lot of snow on the west side of the mountains, and if you get far enough away from Seattle housing is still fairly sane, but not nearly as good as other places in the country. Oregon is also gorgeous, but then you've been there, right?
awww, dear debra and tom, i truly know where you are coming from ... after leo's surgeries, we got used to living with his limitations and slowly got used to the loss of activity - but when he had his hospital stay in august, it seemed to throw a monkey wrench into our life and plans ... i had to really shake myself and tell myself that God was still in control and He still had a plan for our lives ...
but you know all that ... but these kinds of things do remind us all that we are very mortal and that earth is not our eternal home ...
i will pray that the Lord gives you both wisdom and continues to allow your faith to grow!!!
blessings on you guys!
Dera Debra,
I am so sorry to hear about these problems. I did want to remind you that if someone is on social security disability for two years they can go on medicare at that time without waiting until they are 65. I am praying for you and Tom to be led by Grace to a new solution for you both. I know you are in God's Loving Hands. kristi
I hope things get better. I will pray for you. How hard it is for your husband to have back pain. Not fun stuff.
You are getting hit, aren't you? -sigh- All these things are the down side of 50. But what can we do? We have to *embrace* our 50's. The alternative is not acceptable. -grin-
I don't see a B&B as something to be gone into by someone who's probably going to have to go on disability. It's a lot of work and a lot more government inspection stuff to go through now, than in the old days. {Know people who ran one, for a time}
And be very, very careful of alternate forms of insurance. Regular insurance is bad enough, but ... off-the-beaten-path ones, which sound "good," may not be truly so. And with all his medical problems, I'd be scared to death to play games with insurance coverage.
I'm not much positive help, I know. But being well past 50's, I have know these pot-holes are around. We older folks don't tell younger ones, that they are coming. That would be mean. But we know it. And we nod our heads knowingly, when people get to the age where they begin to find out, for themselves.
Hugs,
Mari-Nanci
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