Friday, October 19, 2007
Dealing with Disappointment
Years ago I began learning this: If you can't deal with disappointment, you're gonna have a real hard life.
I mean, like in August when we put our house up for sale, here's what I imagined: Within a couple weeks, we'd have 2 or 3 couples out on the front lawn arguing and fighting over our house. "We got here first!," someone would shout. "No, we did! And we're gonna buy this house! We love it with all our hearts," someone else would say with clenched fists.
heh. Ok, so maybe that's an exaggeration.
And then by December 1st, Tom and I would be trekking our merry way down to Richmond to the pretty house on a huge, peaceful lot we'd bought and Tom would carry me over the threshold. (Now there's a huge exaggeration.)
But things haven't quite worked out like that. No one's been out on the lawn having a tug of war over our house--we've not even received any offers. Although we've come close twice and too, last night we had a very promising showing(!) But even if we sell the house today, still, because we live in good ol' New York, escrow, barring a miracle, will take two long months to close. Good-bye driving down to Richmond on December 1st. (Not to mention the powers-that-be who are hiring Tom have so much on their plate right now with other projects, that they keep pushing back this month's meeting with him... and back.... and back... and the snow keeps looming closer...)
So, see what I mean about dealing with disappointment? And this is only half of what I'm facing now. But I know how vital it is to remain positive and overflowing with faith. To trust God no matter how things appear. To not allow my mouth to ramble any ol' negative, doubt-filled, hopeless junk it wants. The power of life and death are in the tongue, just as the Bible says. I believe that. I've seen it work for both life and death.
And if I'm going to stroll around preaching that to others, I'd sure better be preaching it to myself, first--and acting on it.
It's so good for me to be disappointed sometimes. It helps me remember that God knows best-- I certainly don't. It helps me remember that, ultimately, I'm not in control of much in this life. Often, disappointment has humbled me.
So am I disappointed? Ok, a tad. But I'm encouraging myself in the Lord as King David did, reminding myself that God certainly knows what He's doing, my life is in His hands so I'd better not go leaping out of those hands into my own plans and desperate quick-fixes...
...for I don't want to have to apologize to Him down the road because I panicked and forgot all that. Been there, done that, way too many times already and I so desire to finally grow past it.
"...for we walk by faith, not by sight..."
"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, with all your mind, with all your strength..."