Remember when my big garden used to look like this each summer?
Well, now it looks like this;
Sad, I know. And yes, I'm so embarrassed to show that to you!
And yet.... that is what happens when you become so overwhelmed that you don't even want to look at a tomato plant, let alone grow one.
And I am that overwhelmed. That burned-out from trying to do more than God called me to do.
But there's something good in all this. I know myself so much better now. And knowing oneself keeps oneself from taking on more than she can handle. Keeps her from saying, "I wish I had a ______," ten times a day.
From now on, my wishes will be few. Wiser too. I'll be more content because I lived-out my farm fantasies--and in doing so--discovered a fantasy need not be lived over and over and over. Rather, long-held fantasies can be lived once (say, over a weekend), appreciated, savored, then traded-in for that which is real.
Being and living in realness is just as delightful as living-out the occasional fantasy, especially when your real is the realness God created for you. We need not own a farm (or a boat, a lovely house or a horse) in order to appreciate it and dreams are lovely, but some dreams are loveliest when they remain inside our heads. These are truths I've discovered and they're what I'll take away with me when we drive away from this old farm for the last time.
We need not own a thing in order for it to belong to us.