Monday, September 18, 2006
There I was having a pleasant Sunday afternoon yesterday and then a poison person phoned me.
Sigh. This is a person I can only spend short bits of time with. At this time in my life, I am not strong enough to ward off the poison arrows of negativity which this person shoots at most things, most people, and at me--usually in subtle, underneath-it-all ways. I feel the sting of those little arrows and suddenly find myself swimming around in the Sea of Insecurity. And still dripping after my swim, I then begin cleaning my house. That's what I have forever done when I've felt insecure. I clean things so at least no one can say, "And she lives in a messy house, too."
Yes, I clean, clean, clean until I finally slow down enough for Jesus to catch me. And oh my... how good it feels when He does. When He reminds me of all I mean to Him. And then the peace--wonderful, calming peace, returns. Not because I am good, but because He is. And because I made a choice, because I let Him catch me. For as you know, insecurity and peace are enemies and can't stand together in the same room. One must be chosen, the other, released.
And then usually He will back it all up with a verse or a page from something. That is what He did this morning--He gave me this wonderful page from the book, God Calling:
"And the work of righteousness will be peace and the effect of righteousness quietness and assurance forever. Isaiah 32:17
"...Success is the result of work done in peace. Only so can work yield its increase. There can be no hurry in your plans. You live not in time but in Eternity. It is in the Unseen that your life-future is being planned.
"Abide in Me, and I in you, so will you bring forth much fruit. Be calm, assured, at rest. Love, not rush. Peace, not unrest. Nothing fitful. All effectual. Sown in Prayer, watered by Trust, bearing flower and fruit in Joy."
And I thanked Him for the reminder. If I want to share peace with you in this blog, then I must share it out of a spirit of peace. I cannot share what I do not have. And you are more important than my allowing those little poison darts to remain inside me, time-releasing their poison drop by drop.
And the peace of God has become such a necessity for my daily life that I crave it more, so much more, than my supposed right to be upset. A choice must be made, always, and I will choose peace any and every hour of the week. I've come to need it that much.
"Depart from evil and do good; seek, inquire for, and crave peace and pursue (go after) it!" ... Psalm 34:14