Of Painting Seasons and Grace

Last night at 7 p.m. I began repainting our kitchen. 

I was going to begin this morning, instead, after Tom left for work, but Grace nudged me, whispered, "Why sit around with nothing to do, waiting for tomorrow?" So I slipped my ancient Growing Pains video into the kitchen video player and painted, painted, painted until 10:30, long after Tom had gone to bed. It was just me and the Seavers in the kitchen--oh, and Grace, of course.

Grace. She is amazing.

Way, way back in college I'd sit in my dorm room with a beat-up guitar trying to teach (force) myself to play music. But Grace certainly was not sitting on my bed beside me. No, she was off in some corner where I'd sent her when I insisted on learning to play the guitar--something I was so not meant to do. 

Grace wanted to talk about the insecurities which made me grasp for attention by doing what I was not called to do. But I so did not want to go there. No, I struggled with the guitar, instead. And struggled... until I gave-up.

And then I met Tom--who played guitar and sang like Vince Gill, touching peoples' very hearts. I walked around my house and sang and sang, even taped myself to see how I could improve. There was no improvement for me, just frustration for, once again, Grace was not there to help me sing better so to feed my ego.

Oh the other times! The times God scared me by wanting to work on my tactless mouth, but I thought I'd work on my tendency to leave dirty dishes in the sink overnight. Or my shyness, forgetfulness, even. So I checked-out library books about homemaking and improving ones memory and becoming bolder. I'd read, memorize and struggle (and hit invisible brick walls),all without Grace and God. All without their blessing and timing and strength.

Finally, I allowed Grace to change me. Wow, she changes everything! And when I cooperate with her, frustration is non-existent.


And so welcome to the Painting The Kitchen Season of my life. These are 'before pictures', but the 'after ones' won't be extremely different, for I'm just using a more chiffon-type of yellow and am enjoying watching the knicks, dirt and chips fade away.