"But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere." James 3:17
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Well, Tom bought that expensive new car and Penny Pincher Debra freaked-out (more than I told you, but hey, it's my blog and my reputation. er hem).
Anyway, I went all must-cut-back-on-future-purchases! Must-not-go-broke! Must-not-spend-our-savings-set-aside-for-the-end-of-the-world!
Really.
So I
I imagined a dark future of this and felt royally deprived. Moody. Bummed-out.
By Wednesday I woke up.
I realized rather than using wisdom, I was exercising fear. Fear that if I spent anything, even a reasonable amount, on myself or our house, well, our checking account would sink like the Titanic. And we'd drown in debt (and regret).
Tsk. Tsk. And only when I realized/admitted my folly, was God able to remind me (via various sources) that it's possible to be overly-cautious, too independent and to doubt His provision. That, yes, perhaps Tom's huge purchase was ill-timed, yet there's sowing and reaping and--as long as I keep sowing good things for other folks--He'll make sure I reap good things, myself.
Then I recalled how that rare redecorating season began a couple weeks ago. Would I now toss away that grace/strength/creativity because of fear of lack? Or would I proceed in making purchases using trust (and wisdom, of course)?
Well, I've read my own blog long enough to know what to do. :) If I ignore Grace's timing, all other tasks will feel like struggle. Strength-zapping, must-force-everything, no-delight struggle.
And who wants to live that way? Not me, certainly.
So here I go, out on the wire of faith and trust, but holding hands with God and Grace. The only way to proceed in faith.
Daily.
Hourly.
Minute-by-minute.
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I've not hung the wallpaper in our bathroom yet (I've got my excuses, trust me). But ideas for that whole redecorating project are pouring in.
As a reminder, here's the wallpaper:
And this morning, I ordered this from Ebay:
And this switch plate which will go on a plain grey wall:
I'll have a few dusty-rose accents in the bathroom, as well, and will let you know if when my bathroom redo actually comes together.
These things take time, ya know. :)
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"Be sober [well balanced and self-disciplined], be alert and cautious at all times. That enemy of yours, the devil, prowls around like a roaring lion [fiercely hungry], seeking someone to devour." ... 1 Peter 5:8
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Speaking of 'the end of the world'... Because I spent the last year prepping grocery-wise, we'll need to spend very little money on food. Aren't you glad God knows the future and can tell us the right time to do things?
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Today would have been my grandmother's 103rd birthday. Oh how clearly and fondly I remember one born so very long ago... Happy birthday, Grandma. I can't wait to see you again!
My oh my.... Have you ever heard this instrumental song? Wow. Stopped me in my tracks in our kitchen moments ago. Just had to share. (The visual scenery of the video is gorgeous, also.)
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3 comments:
I'm very glad to hear you sounding more upbeat. Yes God does provide. Your new wallpaper and switch plate are very pretty and I think I had a shelf very similar to that at one time. Too bad I don't still have it, I could've sent it to you and there would've been no cost involved at all! Have a lovely day my friend.
Blessings, Betsy
Debra, I sure do understand your mixed feelings about the new car. Nearly 2 yrs ago, my old car was becoming a safety issue. The electrical system was shot, and our mechanic couldn't even give us an estimate on repairs. My husband and I have been committed savers forever, but we wondered if we should spend money on a new car. Well, we did, and I am SO glad we did. We bought a small SUV that is really easy on my back. Even hubby comments on the ease of getting in and out of it. Well, when my health crises occurred, the new car was such a blessing. My surgery took place in a big hospital, located two hours from home. As we've gotten older, comfort and safety have become big considerations.
I will pray for your acceptance of this new situation you and Tom are facing. It was so hard for me to write out the check for our new car, but now we're so glad we bought it. If we are faithful in our tithing/giving, and try to obey God's plan for us, then we can rest assured that He will continue to provide for us. When we feed our faith with God's truth, then fear will flee. I know that when I focus on good stuff, and God's faithfulness, my entire being changes. It's the only way I can get through each day. He is with us, and that changes everything!!
Betsy--aww, you're sweet. If you'd still have had that shelf I would gladly have accepted it. ...smile... Thanks for noticing I'm more upbeat--I really am and feel the storm has passed. Thankfully!
Pam--so glad your new car worked out for you! The thing with ours? It was awesome, safe, just needed one little repair and would have run another 200,000 miles. Oh well! What's done is done, although, this new car is so complicated that it's hard to imagine I will ever drive it. Don't exactly like the look of it either, but again, what are ya gonna do? :)
Oh, and yep, we've always been tithers. Always, even though it seems to have gone out of style from what I read online. But even so, we'll remain tithers and givers, for it opens up the floodgates of Heaven. (It was just hard for me to accept God would still provide when I felt this wasn't exactly a choice made from wisdom. I still have questions about that, but as I wrote in my post, I have peace that God will provide if we continue in the wisdom of giving.)
Thanks, Ladies, for commenting! Blessings, Debra
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