Friendship Lesson

My post yesterday may have left you with the impression that, while 'wasting time with God,' I've had nothing but fun and good times.

Well, mostly. But not always.

You see, there was the Friendship Test and that one was rough. Have you taken that test yet? For years--like, all my life up till age 35--I thought friendship was the best thing since peanut butter.

See, my family moved every three years, or less, while I was growing-up. My dad was a minister who it seemed, could only put up with the same people for less than three years. And the older I got, the more painful each move became, especially since I was oh so shy. Starting over in a new school was torture. And then moving away again just as I was forming close friendships? Well, that felt like the end of the world.

Back in those days (the 70's), when you moved, you seldom again saw the people you'd left behind. But I was a faithful letter-writer and through all the years and all the moves I collected pen pals from the towns I'd moved away from.

At age 19 I met Tom and we were married four months later (kids, don't try this at home. heh.). Well, anyway, one of our earliest, most memorable arguments occurred when one afternoon Tom got to the mailbox before I did and then teasingly kept my letters out of my reach. He knew I devoured my mail and because of that, he wouldn't hand me three letters I'd received. 

Big mistake. Let's just say that's when he discovered for certain that my friends were my lifeline and letters were what I was living for.

Fast-forward sixteen years, a few more moves and thousands of letters from old friends and coffee house chats with new ones. Basically I had become a friendship-aholic. Like some alcoholics, I was able to hide my dependency from most people--I could play it cool around even my friends. But Tom and Naomi probably saw through much of it.

(I am sparing you so many details.)

But sometime during those hours of 'wasting time with God' the subject of my extreme need of friends popped up. He started confronting me with some heavy-duty truth. Basically, God started telling me that in order for Him to become my closest friend, I had to start coming to Him first when I needed a friendship fix. First. Every time.

Initially, that was hard. Everything inside me was screaming, "But I need my real-in-the-flesh friends!"

But slowly, over time--wonderful time-- it worked. I kept going to Him first again and again. And slowly, God became my best friend. And there was peace. Calm. Fulfillment.

And ten years later, it's all still here. He's the best, the only, 24/7 friend this gal could ever have.

And now He lets me have all the friends I want because I can keep their friendship in perspective. He's not afraid I'll turn back into that sorry, sad friendship-horder. And neither am I. 




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"...but David encouraged himself in the Lord his God..." 1 Samuel 30:6