Friday, February 11, 2011
Running Toward Faith--And Away From Worry
So for a few days Lennon The Cat looked a bit depressed--hanging his head, sad-eyed, sleeping a lot. I promised him that as soon as the weather warmed I'd take him to the vet, but well, yesterday he looked, uhm, just pathetic, and Tom said we should drive Lennon to the doctor right away if we could get an appointment.
Thank-goodness we could and did. On the last of our 16 degree days, I wrapped Lennon in a warm towel and hugged him beside Tom while he drove and ten miles later the vet took a blood test and determined Lennon was only minutes away from seizuring, what with a glucose level of 28 when it should be around 300. Good gracious. In all the years Lennon's been diabetic he's never even come close to nosediving like that. Always, he's been a glowing, white-and-tan healthy (though diabetic) cat.
So we had to leave Lennon there. For two nights. And many hundreds of dollars later I stood at the reception desk writing out a huge check, dazed, not wanting to talk to anyone, feeling horrid for Lennon who wants only to be home, thankful Tom was beside me doing the necessary speaking to the woman taking our money.
Of course, on the way home I became business-like, all, "Okay, right this minute we need to decide where to cut back even farther on our expenses so to make up for this huge expense." But simultaneously I told Tom that God will take care of this somehow because what else could we do? (We'd never needed pet insurance before this.)
And when we arrived home I stared at our monthly expenses list for a long time, crossing off our last newspaper subscription (we agreed to do this) and making notes to turn the heat on later in the mornings, spend less on food and -- well, you know.
The rubber was hitting the road (as they say) and then I paused. It's one thing to talk about real faith or blog about it, but either I can rest in the fact that God will handle this huge bill--or I can't. Either I trust Him--or I don't.
So I relaxed. Closed away my list and my worry, lectured my cranky emotions and reminded myself, "If I do my part, God will do His."
He will, you know. After all, He is in charge here. He is our main provider still standing when all the dust settles.
And all will be well.
If you believe in praying for cats, Lennon, Tom and I would appreciate your prayers for the sweet guy. For nearly 14 years he's been our smart, inspirational little buddy.
This morning McCartney sat on the bathroom hamper, meowing. She never does that. It was as though she was calling for her big brother.
Update: Yay! The vet called and said Lennon is doing great. Plus, Tom and I received a check in the mail that nearly covered one-third of Lennon's doctor bill, money which we'd forgotten was owed to us. Is God good, or what? :)