Uh-oh. If you're having a lovely Valentine's Day and don't want it to be spoiled, please scroll down and read my earlier post. Then return tomorrow to read this one.
In other words, Bad News/Bad Mood Alert!
Previously, Valentine's Day of 2005 was the worst one on record for me. That was the day we discovered that our cat, Skittles, was terminally ill. One week later, she was gone.
Well, six years later, this day feels even worse. The vet told us that Lennon is in renal failure, and most likely, won't last much longer. He'll need those water-like treatments which, fortunately, Naomi can help with since she's had experience with her cat, Oreo.
So there's that. Lennon's home now, but I can barely look at him without crying. For no charge, the vet gave us new syringes, new insulin, a few cans of the new cat food Lennon must eat and didn't charge anything for the extra two nights' stay. We even have a $1.08 credit.
And then on the way home amidst all the grey clouds and grey everything else and 50 mph winds and dirty snow along the road, I told Tom, "I've had it. I cannot take another Buffalo winter. I just can't. Let's move to Kentucky or someplace where snow is rare and real estate is cheap. Sell our house and buy a cabin in the woods, or something."
Yes, I said that. And meant it.
Doesn't help that on Saturday I broke a piece of a back tooth. And I don't currently have dental insurance (but at least a simple filling costs way, way less than just one month's insurance payment would).
And it only goes downhill from there.
So! With the way I/we feel at this moment, I am soooo open to suggestions of where we should move! (Some of you have wished I lived nextdoor so hey! If you don't live in snow country........)
We're thinking some southern state where we could get a beat-up old house on an acre or less for $65,000. (Don't laugh, there are still lots of deals like that here in NY.) Right now, I don't even care what the house looks like. Some area where, if it snows, it's either rare or only a couple inches fall now and again. Someplace where you can take walks during the winter without risking losing a toe (from the cold). And someplace free of tornadoes, floods, hurricanes and earthquakes.
And yes, I am in a bad mood, but! 1.) I went into this winter a little afraid, wondered if I could survive it, so it's not like I haven't imagined moving, 2.) Tom has toyed with the idea of moving from snow country since, like, he first arrived here in a Buffalo blizzard back in '93 and 3.) Now's a good time to leave since Tom's without a job anyway and 4.) Naomi, too, is longing to 'get out of Dodge', more than ever.
So suggest away! And too, I'd appreciate any prayers, for this is a rough time for all of us. The good thing, though, is that I'm beginning to feel some new life blood flowing through my veins--and with the way I've felt the past two weeks (months?), especially--it's a very welcome feeling. I'm thinking this openness to moving is what God's been after all along, for really, something just hasn't felt quite right.
But it feels right now... That elusive divine discontent is falling away and being replaced by much hopeful anticipation.