Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Soul Ties

Eliz asked me to explain what I meant by "Forming soul ties with someone from the opposite sex" in my last post.

Soul ties. Over the years I have watched soul ties steal hearts, destroy marriages and wreak havoc with the children of those marriages.

I would define soul ties as allowing yourself to feel closer emotionally to someone of the opposite sex than you do to your own spouse. To look at that person as your true kindred spirit, to believe that person understands you better than your spouse. Loves you more than your him/her.

Soul ties are dangerous. You can leave me messages in my comment box declaring otherwise, but I'm sorry, (or not sorry); I cannot believe otherwise. 

With my own horrified blue eyes I have watched soul ties between men and women who are married to others, lead to marriage break-ups, emotional distancing in marriages, utter confusion in children as they watch their parent's emotional infidelity and even, horribly, I have seen adultery happen and pregnancies outside of two (Christian) marriages take place. 

And I've seen the devastation ripple outward among relatives of both couples involved--aged parents, grandparents, adult sisters, brothers and their families, aunts and uncles and cousins, friends--which those hurts sear like a knife.

Soul ties start small, innocently. Letting the strings of the heart go just a little farther outward, as one would unwind fishing line on your pole in a lake until woosh! Something heavy is caught at the other end. 

But this something is not a prize, instead, it's a monster waiting to pull people beneath the waters of the lake. A tragedy one cannot release from the line with just a quick twist of the wrist.

Usually, the only cure? A complete break of communication. Of any kind.

No excuses.


"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life." ... Proverbs 4:23

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