In a time when nothing is more certain than change, the commitment of two people to one another has become difficult and rare. Yet, by its scarcity, the beauty and value of this exchange have only been enhanced. ~Robert Sexton
As of today, Tom and I have been married 36 years.
What an impossible thing.
When Tom proposed to me one month after we met, I wondered what had taken him so long. Three months later we clueless-about-Life kids had the wedding and oh, the arguing those first five years.
Mostly, it was oh, the long process of dying to self. Neither of us went down easy, being certifiably stubborn and determined to be the last man/woman standing.
But eventually we let God iron-out the craziest wrinkles and Life felt smoother, especially when we told some well-meaning-folks to knock-off the advice. We needed to discover what worked for us rather than what worked for pushers of one size fits all.
We're both agreed that we've never exactly worked at our marriage. Probably the word 'work' sounds too wearily intense for us who seek the easy way to do anything. If we have any secret to our long-lasting relationship it is this:
Let God change you, each of you, however He wishes.
You go doing that and the pieces almost magically fit into their proper places.
So there you go.
It's a lovely thing to have been married so near Thanksgiving. Always, there's at least one day-off around there which we can choose to spend together. This year we are choosing Friday and this year, as with them all, we'll celebrate with a simplicity that rings true for us and never grows stale.
In the opinion of the world, marriage ends all, as it does in a comedy. The truth is precisely the opposite: it begins all. ~Anne Sophie Swetchine
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