Thursday, January 10, 2008

The other day I had this thought-- People who hate change are usually stuck. And darn unhappy.

That thought came to me while I stood in the sunny kitchen of our apartment. Did I tell you that the window over the sink gets afternoon sunshine and the setting sun as well? And do you know how long I've dreamed of a kitchen window like that? Only the whole 29 years I've been married, that's all. Twenty-nine years! And the window finally came to me when I opened myself up to renting a tiny one-bedroom apartment in the lower front of an ancient gold house near the railroad tracks. The same tracks outside that kitchen window where I watch trains speed by and, with hands in soapy water, dream about the places they are going.

I love living in this apartment. Can you believe it? I mean for the first years of our marriage I thought only a gigantic Victorian house would make me happy, but I never did get one of those. And now? Well, a Victorian house would so make me tired.

Grace led me to this change-- this apartment--and I'm happy there. The kitchen is arranged more efficiently than my old one (and there's that sink window!) and I actually have counterspace surrounding my stove top (feels like a miracle after 14 years)... and there's a laundry closet off the dining room so no longer must I wander down to the dark depths of a basement, lugging heavy baskets up the stairs later. The bedroom is even larger than our previous one was before we opened it to the next room and this one is much easier for arranging the furniture. The living room is simpler to arrange, too. The bedroom closet is longer and larger and the bathroom vanity is tons more convenient than our old pedestal sink and there's the clothesline I've craved for 14 years, as well.

But you know? The old Debra who used to hate change would have hated this apartment. She'd have whined, "It's too small. Too modern-ish. Too much in the wrong part of town and what will people say/think/do when they hear about this?"

But the new Debra is breaking free from what 'they' say (whoever 'they' are...) And she realizes there is no new adventure unless there are a few changes at least somewhere in the journey. And well, she's loving change right about now. She long ago tired of same ol' days strung together like pages in a book you've read a million times. Pages which will never change except to yellow and turn brittle with age.

Oh, sometimes that's exactly what makes a book comforting, especially in times where there's too much change happening in your home or your head or in the world. But other times, other days and other years, change is a doorway to new things, new lessons and new roads rife with new adventures. And I'm learning to view change as a good thing--to trust God that the changes will be good ones, either immediately or after some time. And seeing change now as the open door to adventure and variances of Life, bringing variety and surprises which never could have come otherwise.


Debi said...

I just love the heart that Grace has given you, Debra....
as always, thanks for sharing!

Hilmarose said...

"But other times, other days and other years, change is a doorway to new things, new lessons and new roads rife with new adventures."
Thanks Debra... good post, I needed it!

Dapoppins said...

Great Post. I am one of those people who hates change. Resist change. Groan about change. But change is nearly all ways good.

smilnsigh said...

Your story-of-the-move just keeps getting better and better. I'm so happy for you!


Titus2Grandma said...

I can really relate to exactly how you are feeling. It will be four years in March that WE moved to a small one bedroom apartment across from a bar ! I really didn't want to move here but felt that God was nudging me to agree to make the move. Our apartment is just down the street from our church where my husband works in the tape ministry and he can walk to work. No more 45 min. commute !

We had been living aboard our boat where all the furniture was built in, so we had to completely furnish the apartment. A woman from church told me about a good used furniture store near Lancaster, PA (Amish Country) and I was able to pick out everything we needed in 2 1/2 hours.
The apartment gets sunshine pouring in every window all morning long (something, I had wanted) and the furniture the Lord helped me pick out makes our apartment look just like a cozy cottage inside.I keep apologizing to the Lord for dragging my feet when I just love our apartment !


Mary L.

Kristi in the Western Reserve said...

Hi Debra,

Good for you finding Grace in change! I can imagine many changes ahead for me in the next few years and hope I will do even a little as well as you. We live in time, which is the measure of change, and must find Grace here where we are. It's our only possibility. When do you think you became the Glad One, always counting your blessings?
Kristi, for the moment in Venice, Florida, waiting for daughter Emily and grandaughter Sofia to arrive.....

... Paige said...

Change is one of the great spices of life. And most of us, from time to time, are afraid to taste something new. But once we get the courage-or let go of the fear- we start tasting new things all the time and wander what we were afraid of in the first place.
I am glad you are doing so well! Keep smiling cause what’s it gonna hurt?

Hope said...

Hi Debra,
Even though I haven't commented much lately, I am following your big move and great adventure and always come here to look for your next installment!

You are such an inspiration!!


TheElementary said...

Hi there,
Am enjoying your page immensely! I write about simple living too and my husband and I talk all the time about having a smaller place; we pass tiny U-Haul trucks and wish out loud that we could fit everything we own into them. I am glad to hear of others feeling the same way. We have cleared out a good portion of our possessions but have a long way to go. It is hard work and we try not to be sentimental about it. Cosy is the word, I think, that we are aiming for.
Anyway, wonderful blog.