In wading through my old posts, I found this one. Just for fun today-- and for a more peaceful life.
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(Intriguing title, huh?) ツ
I've been married soo long and well, I've learned there are, basically, two kinds of arguments:
The ones you cannot avoid.
And the ones you can.
Today? The blow-ups I avoid by hiding things.
Like what, you ask?
Like my very own toolbox. Twenty years ago I bought a toolbox and began collecting tools for it (cheap Dollar Tree types. It's not like I use them everyday).
I'd become weary of needing hammers/screwdrivers/stud-finders/nails, etc., while Tom was at work and having to wade through piles of his tools to find them--or not. Usually not, which of course required that I nag Tom about his lack of organization and my frustration thereof.
A real marriage-saver, that one. My toolbox is my responsibility and I keep it hidden, so if a tool is missing? It's my own fault. End of where's-the-tools? squabbles. Whew.
Something else I hide? A chunky black indelible marker which I find indispensable for my kitchen. After probably 300 did-you-lose-my-chunky-black-marker-again? arguments, I finally thought to hide my marker in the hoosier cabinet, a cupboard Tom never peeks inside.
Oh my, Life feels so good when I know my chunky black marker is still where I placed it. And now no needless chunky black marker 'discussions', ever.
Know what else lives inside that cupboard? My very own flashlight. It only took me 27 years to start hiding one of those. No more why-can't-I-ever-find-a-flashlight-around-here? fights. Oh, how sweet that is!
I also hide my own scissors, stapler, glue and measuring tapes.
Get the idea? I'm not speaking about keeping secrets from your spouse,(lest you thought I was going there. Heh.) No, it's more like this:
Many arguments saved(avoided) = lots of peace and harmony earned.
Well, at least, that's what I've found.
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And if you've kids still at home and they discover/use your personal belongings?
1. Find better hiding places.
2. Go stronger on the issue of respecting others' belongings (of course while aiming at faithfulness in that area. Er hem.).
"The tendency to whining and complaining my be taken as the surest sign symptom of little souls and inferior intellects. ... Lord Jeffrey
Ouch!
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Tom and I enjoyed the movie, First Man. Interesting, educational, thought-provoking. A smattering of language and perhaps we fast-forwarded a scene, I'm not certain.
But overall--very good.
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4 comments:
I smiled at your post today Debra, because I know some of my friends that have the same issue with their husbands. However, I have to say that I am blessed with a husband who likes order. When he uses a tool it gets put back in its spot. The same with the stapler, scissors, etc. Whenever I need something I can go directly to it. I never really thought of it being any other way since it’s always been that way since we’ve been married. I’m glad you found a way of avoiding arguments. I’m going to have to suggest this to my friends.
Blessings, Betsy
I chuckled when I read your post and realize I did the same sneaky things in the interest of marital harmony. I also stock up on batteries, extra flashlights, matches and candles. Not sneaky but still kept us happy in emergencies.
A girl has to do what a girl has to do! I have my own toolbox, too, but I never thought about hiding it...where was my brain??? Guess who rummages in it all the time? Yep. Why? Because his tools are out in the barn. Mine are in the kitchen. Doggone it Debra, it's too late to hide mine now! ;)
Dear God in Heaven I am glad to have discovered your blog today! I too am a counter clockwise most happy to be, and lifelong, homemaker. We are still wading our way through one of the top ten worst weeks of our life. Hearing a doc tell you that your old doc, in fact, neglected your care, lied to you, and you now have 85 and 90% damage to your optic nerves will do that to a person you know. The future is all in God’s hands. He gave us yesterday a fantastic consultation with our honest optometrist who verified our feeling that the new doc can be totally trusted to do his best. Talk about a blessing! That was a huge weight off my shoulders. Doesn’t change the despicable facts. Doesn’t give me retribution against the scum doc, but at least I know what doc can be trusted. Satan tried his best to sweep our feet out from under us as we we, literally, on the way to that appointment. That particular problem remains and has problem taken a massive downturn, but that too is in God’s hands and our consciences are clear. Sheesh. So to see just this little bit of fluff was awesome! Such a fresh breeze. Thank you thank you for writing it. There was this one day a few months back when things were closing in and I was desperately longing for chocolate....because...well.....chocolate. And by the grace of God I found a forgotten hunk I’d tuck away from hubby’s eyes. Score, and thank you Jesus! I have my personal tweezers tucked away. And hubby learned in the first year of marriage that marital harmony depends heavily on NEVER EVER TOUCHING THE SEWING SCISSORS. NEVER. EVER. NO MATTER WHAT. My daughter in law, also a seamstress has thanked me for training my son.😀
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