No, not that kind of weight. A different type.
As in, this weekend I asked Naomi to move a couple of her things in our guest room so I could get into our dark side-attic. I needed to store away some oscillating fans (yay! Cooler weather is here to stay.), bring out my winter clothes and replace them with my summer ones.
So, in all the mess, I yanked up the Rubbermaid bin top and saw it. No, not a mouse (or worse), but rather, the white ribbed sweater top I wore to my dad's memorial service. I've worn it, oh, maybe twice since then and whenever I've even spied it in my closet, always I think, "That's the sweater top I wore to my dad's memorial service."
Always.
Now, the memorial service, itself, is mostly a pleasant memory for me, but still, we're talking about being reminded of my dad's death every single time I look at that sweater. So today--finally, three years later--I am letting it go. I'm giving it away to charity. Why keep something which makes me sad and brings back unpleasant memories? (Why, indeed?)
It feels good to let go. Well, after you let go. The actual letting go can hurt, but the after is worth it, that feeling of freedom and lightness.
We so often weigh ourselves down, ourselves. We blame other people and other circumstances, but we are supposed to be in control of our own joy and our own sorrow. No one (and no one thing) can snatch away my happiness unless I allow it.
(And yes, I am remembering there's a time to weep. But I'm also remembering that time is not all the time.)
Letting go is like losing weight, the bad weight which makes even easy things for others, a big struggle for us. You know, like when you're overweight and sitting on the floor and it takes you some contorting and a couple tries to get up, whereas a skinny kid just zips right up to his feet.
Recently I had to let go of a Yahoo group I began in 2005, for Grace had walked away from it a year ago. And I must follow Grace in order to have her help, though this time, I am late in following.
And just before that, I had to release an old friend, for the weight had become quite bad and arrived at the worst possible time. So I let go and God made it all easier because my friend let go, too, though no specific words to that affect were spoken. It was simultaneous. And everything now feels light and freeing and cartwheel-turning-right.
Obeying God is like that and no one else on Earth helps us lose bad weight like He does.
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"You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; 24and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness and holiness." ... From Ephesians 4
3 comments:
Very, very good. Much needed for the time we are in.
I have a sweater I bought to attend my mothers funeral. I've never worn it since...not really thinking about why till now. I think it's time I donated it too.
It's time to lose weight.
When my Dad died my step mother gave me some of his clothes. She did not want to get rid of them herself so she gave them to us. Well we gave away many things. Some we gave to a friend. He had a friend who was looking for work but did not have appropriate clothes. These including the shoes fit perfect...and he got the job! :)I gave others to my neighbor and they fit perfectly and he was in need of exactly those things. Then I had some left that were harder to part with. It took me a long time but I finally released them. As you said everytime I would open that cupboard I would see them and start to cry remembering my wonderful father. What good were they doing to me when some one needed them? Having things, anything, in your home that does not make you feel good is not a good idea. Thanks for the reminder. There are other things to get rid of now...Sarah
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