Reading over my last few posts I've realized I've done some extreme whining this summer. And well, Whiner Debra returns in this post so if you're already eye-rolling-weary of her, feel free to click away to the next blog. :)
Mostly I love having a blog and mostly it feels like a dream come true. How wonderful to write about all the things I've held inside for decades and how incredible that people--that you-- read those thoughts.
However, sometimes I'm annoyed by the whole thing. By the occasional snarky comment, you ask? By the annoying Blogger glitches? By having to think of something about which to write?
No, none of those things bug me. Rather, it's the being tested by God about nearly everything I write. You know, kinda like the Bible verse which says teachers will receive the greater judgement. And being somewhat of a teacher in this blog, boy do I get tested on what I write to see if I, a.) really believe what I say and b.) am living it for myself.
My latest annoying test? Well, it's Lori's house over at Kim's Daisy Cottage. Gracious. To me, her house is the epitome of perfection. I love the colors and decor and her creativity, energy, and talent amaze and awe me.
And every photo over there is depressing me into one sour ol' bad mood.
Why? Because instead of letting myself feel inspired and invigorated by the challenge of getting my house to look that incredible (as I've told you to do zillions of times here), I'm instead, allowing all that rampant creativity to defeat me. To make me feel one-hundred years behind in the creativity department. To make me wonder where did all my creativity go anyway? Where have I been and what am I doing and how am I going to catch up?
So totally the opposite of what I encourage you all to do here, like, every week.
But I know, I know.... Hop back up on the horse and start riding in the right direction. Do something, even if it's small. Just start. Make a dent. It's up to us to remain inspired and motivated, not defeated. Follow Grace, not your emotions. Hang in there. Appreciate progress, even tiny progress. And remember: Baby steps, baby steps, baby steps.
Yes, these are things I've told you all to do for years and I certainly need to be putting them into practice for myself again. I know, I know already! :)
But that's another good thing about having a blog. Here, in print, I can read back over hundreds of posts, encourage myself, and take--and live--my own advice. Just as God expects this teacher to do.