Thursday, July 07, 2005

Can Anyone Have Too Many Friends?




You ask a simple question like, "Can anyone have too many friends?," and people morph into instant parrots, mimicking words they have always heard before: "No, of course not! Friends are treasures and the more you have, the better."

Come on. Has anyone besides me ever thought that question through?

For one thing, it's possible to have so many friends that you end up being a good friend to none. We can spread ourselves too thin, you know. 

We can have friends who pull us in directions we ought not to go. Friends who spin us out of balance because of the time, money and effort they ask of us. Friends who require they come before our families, our work, our other relationships.

--friends who keep us so busy, distracted that we come to the end of our lives never having fulfilled our destiny, our purpose.

--friends who carry with them a negativity about life which attaches itself to us, yanking us downward into discomfort, darkness of mind.

-- friends who get offended at the drop of a hat, requiring of us extra time in trying to heal their wounds.

-- friends who ask us to support their dreams with our words, time and help, but never returning the favor.

--and again, we can even have so many wonderful, generous friends, that we spend the majority of our days feeling guilty because we're unable to give back to them all they gave to us.

--and more.

Five years ago I went online and found old friends in this Internet World and new friends, kindred spirits galore and now this incredible Blogland.

And eegads. Color me overwhelmed. I so want to keep up with everyone! With each of you, but I can't, not if I also want to complete the callings God has given me to fulfill before I die.

You'll find no parrot here. I've thought this one out and this is what I have experienced first-hand. If you can keep up with 200 close, personal friends, more power to you! 

I seriously wish I could, but well, no. I simply can't.

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Clarification: I do realize there are many different types of friendships, each requiring different amounts of time, effort, etc. But the real tragedy is when I start telling my closest friends, "If you want to keep up with what's new with me, you'll have to check my blog." That, to me, is pathetic. And that is exactly what I've been doing lately--and it's going to stop.

"Look carefully then how you walk! Live purposefully and worthily and accurately, not as the unwise and witless, but as wise (sensible, intelligent people)... Therefore do not be vague and thoughtless and foolish, but understanding and firmly grasping what the will of the Lord is." Ephesians 5:15,17


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