Wednesday, April 19, 2017
The Car That Hates Me Or, Passive-Aggressive Much?
"A sense of humor helps us to get through the dull times, cope with the difficult times, enjoy the good times and manage the scary times.” .... Steve Goodier
Passive-aggressive -- displaying behavior characterized by the expression of negative feelings, resentment, and aggression in an unassertive passive way (as through procrastination and stubbornness).
So I forgot to tell you that Tom arrived home safely (and sanely this time plane-wise) from San Francisco. So there's that.
Now, while he was away I meant to (really I did) drive our new car for the first time. Yes, we've owned that blue beast out in the garage since October, but no, I'd still not driven it.
I know, I know.
And I also know that kind ol' sweet Debra's has, most likely, some passive-aggressive issues going on with what she's affectionately named That Stupid Car. The one who laughs at me (seriously, I've heard it) when I do the tap-tap-on-the-handle-to-lock-it thing. If you recall, I didn't want Tom to buy the car, especially without saving up money for it, first. But he went ahead anyway.
And as I said, I'd not driven it in the whole 6 months since.
Well, because I'm kinda well-read and not stupid, I did realize weeks ago that, probably, my reasonable, calm excuses for not driving That Stupid Car blatantly illustrate I'm being passive-aggressive. And I got the clear signal when I became bored last week, yet there sat the car, able to take me to any fun place I wished. But I only looked away.
Well, finally on Friday, I reminded myself how often I've told you to face your fears/hang-ups/procrastinations with boldness. And well,not wishing to be a hypocrite, I said, "Ok. I'll drive to the supermarket."
So I made my list, got dressed, made-up, cleaned out my purse then grabbed my keys and walked out to the garage, determined to be brave. And get this over with.
But good grief. Would That Stupid Car even start for me? Noooo. I pushed the starter button like I'd seen Tom do, but the engine didn't even cough. No, but dashboard lights flashed pictures and all sorts of messages, one about depressing the brake if I wanted to go anywhere.
Then the car laughed at me. Again.
"'Depress the brake before starting'? What does that even mean?" I muttered. "Oh, maybe Tom left the emergency brake on." So I pulled what I thought was the brake, but the hood came open. Well, unlatched, creating a new little dashboard picture.
Oh, for Pete's sake.
Well, I got out, closed the hood, stepped back in. Tapped the foot brake, pushed the starter button and got the same, "Depress the brake before starting,(you moron)," message. Then I sat there and fumed that anyone would ever design or buy such a complicated vehicle.
Then I gave up. Locked the car, closed the garage door and walked to 7-11 for some much-needed ice cream, instead.
But you know? While walking along, I actually felt good that hey, I'd tried. I'd stepped past my passive-aggression and fear of the unknown and had obeyed God's nudging and tried something new. It hadn't worked out, but I'd been brave.
And, with a joy of obedience, I could happily live with that. Especially with ice cream.
Then our mouth was filled with laughter, and our tongue with shouts of joy; then they said among the nations, “The Lord has done great things for them.” .... Psalm 126:2
Oh, and the next day I told Tom about this ridiculous adventure. He laughed, then said, "You're supposed to keep your foot on the brake until the car starts. It's a safety feature."
Really? He forgot to tell me--rather than place your foot on the gas pedal as I (and millions of others) had done for decades--I should press the brake? Hmmm. Maybe ol' Tom has passive aggressive issues of his own, as in, perhaps he rather enjoys being the only driver of our car.
Interesting. Vedy, vedy interesting.
(Oh, and P.S. I will drive That Stupid Car someday. I'll just take Tom with me the first time.) 😌
Oh wow! This, below, nailed me. Explained why I can't stand to watch people disagree in conversations on tv. Oy!