But What's Going Right?

"Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it and indulge it will eat its fruit and bear the consequences of their words... Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."   --- Proverbs 18:21, Proverbs 4:23

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So then came the time Tom fell in the kitchen.

I stepped inside from the front porch and Tom said he fell over Poncho, but not on him. "He freaked out and ran here, there, then upstairs. I think maybe I traumatized him." Sadly, he shook his head. You know, like he'd ruined our new cat.

"No! Don't speak that out loud," I stated. "You know our words are important." (He apologized, then took back the words.)

I said, "I'll go upstairs and give Poncho some treats. He's the kind of cat who forgives us everything if we just throw some treats at him."

And although, at first, Poncho nervously (after a silent moment) peaked out from beneath the guest bed, I tossed treats to him and he became all excited. He ate the treats and returned to his same ol' goofy self still to this day.

Anyway, since the trauma I experienced last March (with unfairly losing Charlie Cat) I've had to retrain my brain to guard my words, heart and thoughts.

Oh Honey, they went over to the dark side after that tragedy and wow. All the complain-y thoughts within my head and mouth!

But I've had to remind myself of the danger of semi-constantly complaining. It can morph into this:

"If allowed to loop within the brain continually, harmful behaviors such as complaining will inevitably alter thought processes. Altered thoughts lead to altered beliefs, leading to a behavior change.

Additionally, our brain possesses something called the negativity bias. In simple terms, negativity bias is the brain’s tendency to focus more on adverse circumstances than positive." (For more, go here.)

It actually can become difficult to think of the positive of one's life if we don't stop the complaining soon enough. And who wants a negative mind?

So I'm working extra hard on becoming who I once was. 

Mornings, I read from lots of positive, you-can-do-this books. 

I'm reminding myself to stay decisive (yesterday we watched the new Godzilla movie and boy, did the main character ever need that advice!)  シ

I watch videos with cheerful, making-a-difference folks.

I nudge myself to remain proactive, creative and open to ideas for making our home (and life) more senior-friendly.

I remind myself to eat my vegetables and take my vitamins.

And I get out in the sun and walk around our yard/gardens (or down to the Little Free Library) and call it exercise. heh.

And more, but you get it.

The worst thing we can do? Feel all guilty about having slipped backward. No self-condemned, guilt-ridden person ever got healed while they clung to all that junk.

Let. It. Go.

Oh, how Almighty God wants to heal each of us! And fortunately He's got outlined plans for that in His Word. What remains is for us to look it all up, then do it.

His way.

(Yikes! And it's kinda like a type of 'destroying angel' still comes along and wrecks our mind when we take up the habit of complaining. Something positive does seem to die within us.)

"Do all things without grumbling or disputing, that you may be blameless and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and twisted generation, among whom you shine as lights in the world..."   Philippains 2:14.15

Gratitude. It's reminding ourselves of what's gone right. Of what is lovely in our life.

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Wow! What a luxurious tiny house and ok, expensive. But she had the best customizing ideas, ever. So there's that. (Loved the secret bedroom. Maybe that's what I'll start calling mine!)

Aww, this lady is so sweet, dreamy and lovely in her single wide mobile home. Kinda mesmerizing, this video.

How One Woman Saved 10,000 Jewish Children. Oh my! How had I never heard of her before?

Probably the most helpful of flower gardening advice I'd ever come across:  How To Grow a "No-Work" Flower Garden. Appreciated this much.

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A favorite 'summertime verse'!

Oh the humidity!  ッ

"We should war against the spirit of sadness,depression & fear with a genuine spirit of celebrating what God has done for us." -Joyce Meyer

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Please remember: My posts are always about more than they appear to be. 

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 "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." ... Matthew 6:14,15

When Your Retirement Dreams Must All Change

"  ... be content with what you have, for he has said, “I will never leave you nor forsake you... to everything there is a season, and a time to every purpose under Heaven.”   --- Hebrews 13:5, Ecclesiastes 3:1

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While scrolling mindlessly here upstairs, I heard a loud thud.

Darn. I knew that meant Tom fell. Again. And while I traipsed down the stairs, I thought (once more), "At this rate, our retirement years will be lived awfully close to home. Like, inside these very walls."

I found Tom sitting upon his bed and asked if he'd fallen. He said he had then he paused and added, "I guess we really won't be traveling much when I retire."

This past year of rough times, we've often had that conversation and many instances? I've felt myself begin to slide below the quicksand of self-pity, beneath its taunting, dark voices.

But no! I cannot afford to do that. I believe in making all my days special (well, I try) and no one has even one special day underneath the mire of self-pity.

How vital to fight against the lies! Those which erase our gratitude and the creativity needed for adventuring within our remaining dreams.

We fight against self-pity with truth. 

So when I hear, "Too bad only your friends can fly places and camp and travel by car or train, but not you," I remind myself that truthfully? At the end of our last train trip I thought, "Truly, four times crossing this country was plenty. Tiring. Enough for me. Forever."

Frankly, home is the most comfortable, pleasant place on Planet Earth for me. My family. My cats. My books, wide front porch, my bed in a wallpapered closet room, our inspirational movies, cozy rooms, gardens and the calm, blue river down the street.

Also, God sweetly gave Tom all the opportunities he'd ever wanted, via various jobs, to travel, both domesticly and foreign. He's so grateful, but only recently has he let the dream die of more such trips. 

Tom's learning to appreciate the whole thing of seasons. How none are meant to last forever, but instead, to be forever appreciated for the time they lasted.

So now? We both love, via Youtube, watching others travel. And what a joy to let them make all those plans, do all that plodding along walking, spend all that money so they can share their adventures with us ...

...we who can no longer travel around the world, but rather, only around the block. With gratitude.

I'd planned to add the other future-related lies self-pity pings me with lately, but let's not lengthen this to the point of distraction.

Since you and I are both aging, probably the voices we hear are quite similar.

What remains? Tell them to hush, then arise in a God-given determination to move forward in joy.

"Does opposition weaken your resolve, even depress you, or does it make you all the more determined to keep pressing forward?" 

-Joyce Meyer

If we never let anything steal our determined sense of creativity, we'll always live in a lovely place.

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Would you like to visit one of Agatha Christie's homes? Here you go.

I've been considering returning to crocheting and oh my. This young woman certainly inspired me with her  nine lovely blankets!

Wow. It's difficult to believe this was ever a dated ranch house. What a lovely job she and her husband did on recreating their home.

I loved all the details this woman thought of! Thrifting to create the old money interior design aesthetic like Ralph Lauren

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Our very silly cats, Happy and Poncho.  ツ

Oh, and again... this post is not just about my no longer being able to travel. Rather, it's about bravely facing the things we all must change as we and our circumstances evolve (devolve? heh.).

One of the very best things we can do as we grow older? Become more determined to only let challenges inspire--not defeat--us.

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Please remember: My posts are always about more than they appear to be. 

 *** 

 "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." ... Matthew 6:14,15

Where She Needed More Time Off

"Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen."   --- Hebrews 11:1

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Still here! But just barely. heh. 

Heat and humidity swooped in early and broke records (since the 1960's!) and I went into survival mode. (Only some of you understand that.) 

The pleasant thing? The excuse to loll around on the red couch watching the remainder of the Aurora Teagarden movies.

Wow. Tell me you've watched those! Just the right amount of mystery and none of the offensive stuff. In fact, I'm (don't tell anyone) missing the folks of Lawrenceton so I'm rewatching a few episodes.

Er hem.

Anyway, we've returned to cool, Spring-like temperatures and I feel normal again. 

Well, mostly. More time, more healing, more listening and obeying that still, small voice are needed for a complete healing from March's trauma. Seriously, I'm so thankful for God--only He has encouraged me consistently, firmly, yet gently, too, the way I so needed.

Only Him. Oh, kind-minded people came and went, but God came and stayed. How does anyone survive without Him, especially after they invested more of their heart in a cat than they could afford to lose? When their faith wobbled a bit from the sting?

So I'm back to guarding my heart with all diligence--the good, not bad, way--and retracing my steps to where I used to be. And beyond.

And never walking alone.

We discover how strong our faith really is during our toughest times. That's also when we find out who our true friends are as well as how strong God has become within us (and where a few gaps may still exist).

--and--

Giving oneself time off to heal requires a bravery of heart, a not-caring that others may misunderstand. A larger caring that what God, Himself, asks is what matters more than all else.

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Most of the Aurora Teagarden films are free at Youtube. I watched the available ones in order, then signed up for a free week of Hallmark Movies Now so to watch the rest.

Seriously, I enjoyed these much (and I'm not even a Hallmark fan, so that should tell you something.)  シ

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My Prayer Garden this Springtime. Peer closely to spy the red roses:

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Darn! Blogger isn't letting me make links today and I know many of you enjoy the places I usually send you. I'll look into it. Sigh.

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Books I finished reading in May:

Take the Honey and Run by Jennie Marts

The Mystery of the Empty Room by August Huiell Seaman

Sleeping at the Starlite Motel by Bailey White

The Sapphire Signet by Augusta Huiell Seaman

The Riddle of the Lonely House by Augusta Huiell Seaman

The Grass is Always Greener Over the Septic Tank by Erma Bombeck

Mystery of the Red Carnations by Mary C. Jane

Mama Makes Up Her Mind by Bailey White

Mystery on Nine Mile Marsh by Mary C. Jane

The Wonder Years, 40  Women Over 40 by Leslie Leyland Fields, editor

The Sod House by Elizabeth Coatsworth

Mystery at Pemaquid Point by Mary C. Jane

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Here is a complete list of the Aurora Teagarden movies in order of their release:

• A Bone to Pick (2015)
• Real Murders (2015)
• Three Bedrooms, One Corpse (2016)
• The Julius House (2016)
• Dead Over Heels (2017)
• A Bundle of Trouble (2017)
• Last Scene Alive (2018)
• Reap What You Sew (2018)
• The Disappearing Game (2018)
• A Game of Cat and Mouse (2019)
• An Inheritance to Die For (2019)
• A Very Foul Play (2019)
• Heist and Seek (2020)
• Reunited and It Feels So Deadly (2020)
• How to Con a Con (2021)
• Til Death Do Us Part (2021)
• Honeymoon, Honeymurder (2021)
• Haunted by Murder (2022)

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(Coming soon!)

Please remember: My posts are always about more than they appear to be. *** "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." ... Matthew 6:14,15