"Heal me, Lord, and I will be healed; save me and I will be saved, for you are the one I praise." --- Jeremiah 17:14
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Remember when I had vertigo? Eventually I felt it only while lowering myself into bed each night. (At least 'falling into bed' is safe.)
I prayed, had you pray, took colloidal silver and vitamins (etc.), believed it would vanish and it did. Not until last week, though.
While down with covid I lost my sense of taste. Yikes! Took 8 whole days (believe me, I counted), but it returned the perfect day--our Saturdate. Wow, my honey chipotle chicken, corn on the cob and coleslaw delivery never, ever had tasted so divine.
Such gratitude and celebration within me, even now. (And more good news? Yesterday, 3 1/2 weeks into this, I noticed a marked improvement, well, except my hearing is 'off'. Any prayer would be appreciated.)
Sickness. What a test, especially when, while in our weakened state, satan comes along whispering myriad lies. Probably his favorite is, "You won't recover. Never will you return to the health of your former self."
Now, I attempted to stay strong inside with gratitude and praise, pushing the lies away, standing against them. Yet I did (calmly) ask myself: "If I don't survive this, what are my regrets?"
Scary question and mostly I thought of small (but are they really?) examples of my humanity. The times I hesitated out of doubt or chose fear, not boldness. Or I procrastinated and things (or people) fell apart because I hadn't followed God's timing.
Yet I'd long ago asked forgiveness for those and had vowed to move forward, improving the next time(s).
But. While lying upon my bed a bit delusionally, one regret did nearly light up my whole closet room. Which regret? That--if I didn't survive this--Tom and Naomi would have to sort through and discard all my stuff.
Stuff! Even after these past 3 years of decluttering, I still own too many things. And I know this thought came from the Holy Spirit, for no condemnation arrived with it. Just pure conviction and hope and a strong you-can-do-this! nudge.
Years ago I told you that hopefully I'd be wearing make-up if family (especially) found me deceased. I mean, hey. My make-up-less face would scare them more. シ Rather a humorous post (considering the subject), but interestingly? A friend wrote that she'd not care at all about how she'd look to whoever discovered her for--after all--she'd be dead. Gone.
And although I understand that reasoning, still, I can't adopt it as my own. To have my family and friends work harder than necessary carting away my own special hoard which I could have, slowly over years, disposed of, myself?
No, even after I've peacefully floated away to Heaven I'll care about that because I'll still care about them. And about you.
And may my legacy not be "Man, she sure left tons of cool stuff!", but rather, "Didn't she leave us lots of inspiration, encouragement, much to think about and a more loving picture of Jesus?"
"A man could walk away for a thousand mornings carrying something with him to the corner and there would still be a home full of stuff." --- E. B. White
(My oh my, is that ever true!)
This might sound strange, but this post, Cleaning Up After The Party, has been the biggest help for me in letting go of things. I keep thanking God for giving it to me in that light, those words. シ
Oh, how wonderful when we finally get on the same page as the Holy Spirit. That's when He begins providing folks who will inspire us to do what He's asked.
Like, this week I discovered the Clutterbug lady and she's a delight! She encourages us to declutter then organize what's left in the manner that suits our personalities best.
Here's the first video I viewed and it's still my favorite.
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I'm enjoying the Tiny House Expedition videos, for not only do we see tiny homes, but we hear their owners' unique stories of why they chose tiny over normal/large. Interesting stuff.
When God asks us to do something, He's certainly there to help us do it!
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"For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses." ... Matthew 6:14,15
Lots to think about here. First of all, when you said if something were to happen to you, one of your regrets would be having Tom and Naomi going through your possessions. When I read that, I thought, hallelujah, you've shared your lives for a long while now, said what needs to be said, helped each other, and loved one another, always. I guess what I'm trying to say (I'm still sick with some virus and a fever so my brain lags a bit)is that most people would be overjoyed if that were the main drawback to your demise. On the other hand, I do believe it's very important for us to listen to the Lord and obey Him. After spending more than a year cleaning stuff out of our old house, I sure don't want to end up in that kind of mess again! And I don't want my hubby and kids to face anything like that, either. The Lord will help us with this!
ReplyDeleteDebra ... honey, your legacy will most assuredly be that you left many people lots of inspiration, encouragement, much to think about and a more loving picture of Jesus - never doubt that for a minute!! I'm so glad that you pulled through AND that you got your taste back as well. Like you, I need to get busy and go through things - I really need to start being way more consistent than I have been. I'm far from a hoarder but truly, I have so many things that I just don't need anymore.
ReplyDeleteHave an awesome day!
Debi
I'm sorry you're still not completely well Debra. I arrived back home late, late Friday night so I'm once again able to comment on blogs. I agree with Pam. What a relief that having too many possessions is what you're worried about. I do feel the same. We may be facing another move. I love our apartment but finally a condo *might* be coming available in the building we've been waiting for for almost 2 years. The apartment rent has gone up 7% last year and this year. So many are moving because of the costs of living of everything else too, they can't afford it. We'll see what happens with us.
ReplyDeleteI did come home with some kind of sinus thing happening. I think it was the extremely dry air on the plane. I did a covid test this morning and that was negative. Hallelujah! Considering I'm still dealing with a residual cough and fatigue from our December round of it.
Blessings and love,
Betsy