Wednesday, December 18, 2013

My Best of Times, My Worst and Contentment


"Not my will but Yours be done."   ... Luke 22:42

****

Hobbit Cottage is a magical (the good kind) place.

The contentment wafts thick upon the air here, especially since I learned (on a deeper level) to only want what God wants for me.

Remember our farm? Mostly Tom and I wanted that and God just wanted us to get over wanting one. So He let us have a farm and it turned into one of those, "It was the best of times and the worst of times," type of things.

Maybe you remember some of that.

Yet one day I hiked around those gorgeous 4 acres and I just dreamed of escaping. They were beautiful, but in the end, I hated them. (Yes, hated them more than I ever confessed to you here.)

But the amazing thing? After whole decades of believing I'd love a farm every time I drove past one or glimpsed one on tv, now I can see the beauty of country living again, but I never desire it for myself. I'm forever free from that.

Now, instead, I desire to use-up my energy on what God designed me, personally, uniquely to do. Now I want only what God wants for my present, my future, also.

So since it appears He doesn't want me to have grandchildren, I stop myself from wanting them. Since God made a way for Naomi to move to Nashville, I don't allow my brain to wish she'd move closer. Since she's unable to visit for holidays, I accept that--and feel an infusion of God's joy.

Since God, apparently, wants me to be content (and creative) here at Hobbit Cottage, I've stopped planning to buy another house (and try not to complain about this one).

Since I'm thinking He believes Buffalo needs another old-fashioned snowy Winter, I don't allow myself to long for Springtime. Not now, anyway. Not even for two seconds.

And long ago I stopped wishing I could sing or paint or dance and just got happy with an ability to write. I ceased wishing to go back in Time, to be younger or to move closer to the people I love best.

There is such a thing as self-control, you know. We are not helpless or victims. God designed us braver, stronger than that.

And somewhere along my way I guess I've finally grown-up. Took long enough, yes. And now, like every single day, I experience awesome, uber-contentment nearly to the gate of giddiness.

It has become very well with this over-50 soul.

And what plays inside my head over and over? It's what Clarence the Angel told the discontented George Bailey: " You know, George... You really did have a wonderful life."

And because of Jesus patiently walking me through mine, so have I. So have I.



*****

"But godliness with contentment is great gain."    ... 1 Timothy 6:6 



*****



“Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough”
― Oprah Winfrey


“We need much less than we think we need.”
― Maya Angelou



"Complain and remain."   ... Joyce Meyer


*****

Did you watch the latest TCM Remembers yet? Here it is.

5 comments:

  1. Anonymous10:26 AM

    Grandchildren, yes they are nice to have...but many people hardly ever see theirs for one reason or another, so in my opinion, it might be easier not to have them, if you never get to see them or know them. Our grandchildren are divided by the whole country, they are a continent apart...so chances are in time, we might be able to see one part of them and not the others (as we age, travel gets harder). Life seems made up of such things however...things we have to adjust to and find ways to be content anyway. Sounds like you have done well in adapting to your only child being fairly far away...but I think it is ok to wish you could see her more often too. I have been adapting to not being with the youngest of ours, who lived with us until her late 20's...this last year most of the year we were far from each other. One adjusts. But we both wished at times we could have been together. Being able to skype has been most helpful...it is so nice to be able to SEE someone when you are talking to them!! I hope you do that with Naomi sometimes too!

    Well, have you planned out what Chinese food you will order on the holiday?? We will be traveling then, but I hope we can find some good Chinese someplace!! YUMMY!!
    Elizabeth in NC

    ReplyDelete
  2. Anonymous1:23 PM

    I love this post Debra.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dolores1:24 PM

    The above comment is from me.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Anonymous5:04 PM

    This over seventy gal is finding contentment here on the farm. ( My sweet husband told me just today, "You'll always be a girl in my book.")
    In spite of osteoarthritis trying to knock me down I still am able to milk my small goats and care for my husband and home without difficulty. It is a different season in our life but God brought us here 27 years ago and until/unless He moves us on here we remain.
    We are delighted with the antics of our three siamese cats and enjoy the warmth of a wood cook stove. I no longer use it for cooking...only keeping things warm but it puts out a lot of heat.
    We are only now coming to a time when we can watch Netflix episodes in the evening and on long, lazy Sunday afternoons.
    Our 12 grandkids are spread from Maine to California to NC and Florida. And we try to hold them all with hands wide open.
    God is so Good!
    Jan

    ReplyDelete
  5. Anonymous9:03 AM

    Especially, like this one! Joyce

    ReplyDelete

Thanks for your comments-- I love to read what you are thinking! If you are unable to comment, please contact me at gladone4@protonmail.com. Oh, and please be kind. Thank-you.