What's It Like For God to Watch Me?

Brace yourself.

During these past three weeks of snow and freezing and job searches and mulling over decisions which need to be made, Tom and I have been Netflixing The X-Files.

No, really.

But relax. Our blu-ray player enables us to read the blurbs about each episode beforehand so we skip any which mention ghosts or demons or cults, etc., and instead, we choose only the episodes with weird bugs, strange people or little green martians.

We have our morals, you know. :)

Anyway, we are, like, totally addicted. X-Files is like a combination of 24, Stargate Atlantis and Stargate SG-1, all favorites of ours, and oh, the suspense!

But the X-Files also makes me think. Like, this morning I thought about how Fox Mulder--at first--was open to anything out of the ordinary. He was willing to believe what others instantly dismissed because their minds were closed to anything unfamiliar to their past experience (sound familar to any of you other church folk out there?).

Dana Scully--at first--was close-minded, but slowly her mind became more open, that is, as long as what she saw could be explained by science. Which, alas, limited her ability to see many unusual things for what they really were. For after all, some things are real but simply cannot be explained by science or anyone else, so Scully's case reports always contained more questions than answers.

Without sharing any spoilers, I'll just say that by season five, Mulder changed. Suddenly he doubted everything he saw, rejected all explanations, which in comparison, practically made Scully appear like a true believer of anything out of the ordinary.

And oh my, it felt so wrong to see Mulder like that! Suddenly he became a depressed, defeated doubter of all things he once believed. Suddenly he lost his hope and became a sad, disillusioned, pathetic shell of his former self.

It was so hard watching those episodes. 

Whereas I'd spent four seasons admiring this guy's openness and search for the truth, now, in season five, I couldn't stand him. It was like watching a sad, sad train wreck. Or something.

And here's what came to me this morning: Most likely when God is watching me, I look like a sad, sad train wreck to Him when I allow myself to grow discouraged and mopey. When I turn all doubtful and sarcastic, forgetting what God did for me in the past, choosing only to concentrate on The Current Event-Gone-Wrong of The Day.

What must He think when I forget just how darn huge and supernatural He really is and start believing my doubts, instead?

Tom and I are watching The X-Files everyday, but God is watching us every single second. May we not make Him groan, roll His eyes and wish He could change the channel.





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John 14:27
Peace I leave with you; My [own] peace I now give and bequeath to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid. [Stop allowing yourselves to be agitated and disturbed; and do not permit yourselves to be fearful and intimidated and cowardly and unsettled.] (Amplified)


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We're currently watching Season Six of The X-Files and these are the episodes we've found to be exceptionally excellent so far:

Monday
Tithonus
Drive
Field Trip
Dreamland 1
Dreamland 2
S.R. 819
The Rain King


These can be found at the Netflix instant view thingamajig and most stand alone, as in, you don't have to have watched from season one to know what's going on.

If you are a huge fan of The Hallmark Channel, well, you probably won't like these. :)



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The photo: I moved the little red table to the bay window recently. Because of the three big windows, it's a nice place to sit with coffee and a book when, on snowy days, I want to feel as though I'm outside.