Oh Yeah, Sunlight!

Man, I forgot that I so need extra sunlight. 

Way back in 1986 we lived in the mountains with endless winters inside a dark house, one facing north and with not enough windows. And by the middle of one winter? I became a sorry, weepy mess. But then I read about the seasonal disorder thing and began taking walks again, even on cloudy days, and sat in front of windows and underneath lights (and all that good stuff) and got better.

Well, this past week I reread my diary from 2007 and was amazed at all the entries describing walks around the block and to stores, the library and Burger King down the way. A whole different life than my current one! Seems I was always going somewhere, nearly always happy, seems I was never as overwhelmed, moody and snippy as I've been here on this farm lately.

Now, at first I surmised that I missed our old town where we lived nearly 15 years. They had lots of stores there and activities and they even had sidewalks. (The only sidewalks here in this country place are nearer downtown.)

So this weekend Tom and I drove back to that town because I thought perhaps that would cheer me. Yet at first, only the same ol' gratitude that we'd moved away returned: all those too-close houses and traffic and hurry-hurry! 

But then we bought lunch and drove to my favorite spot at the park where we sat in the sun, eating lunch, while Tom read from Mama Makes Up Her Mind. I sat there, staring at a young man practicing hoop shots while the sunlight poured down upon me through the window.

And that's when I remembered: I so need sunlight! Duh. 

It wasn't that I missed our old town, but rather, my body is missing the sunlight from all those walks and our 4-season, many-windowed sunroom. And it misses all the sun I got this past spring and early summer while playing in my garden and digging in my flower beds.

Good grief.

I'd been relying on my nightly dose of Vitamin D3 from a pill, but sunlight (even faint sunlight through clouds) will always trump pills and I'd not been spending hours in front of windows and surrounding myself with light, not lately, and my resulting moodiness had parked me on the couch in our darkish living room, only worsening things.

Well, it's a safe bet I'll not be forgetting this lesson again anytime soon.

And now? If you visit me you'll see my face pressed up against windows or if you drive around my town you'll more often glimpse me out walking beside the road. Wave when you drive by, ok?



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P.S. Yes, I know about the special lamps out there for folks like me. I've just always been too cheap to buy one and probably too paranoid about the safety of them. But we'll see how things go the next few weeks.



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