Singing or Groaning?

Over at Saija's blog, she wrote about the hymn which she tends to hum around the house.

And that reminded me--each December when I slosh through snowy parking lots or wander down bright department store aisles, I hum "Angels We Have Heard On High." The wispy, raspy, milk-it-till-you-cry version. I hum that song until it feels almost like a movie soundtrack and I'm the main character who, at the time, is shopping for gifts while somewhere in the background, film of my golden past memories is rolling.

December is a reflective month, perhaps because it's the final one of the year. Or maybe because there's so much Christmas-ing going on that my mind is saying slooow down and count your blessings from Christmases long, long ago.

But all this reminds me of yet another thing. I rarely set an alarm clock for mornings because usually, though it's still pitch black outside, I can feel when it's time to arise. That's because of the songs--I like to call them the songs in my heart. When I open my eyes and can hear one of those heart songs playing, then I know it must be quite close to 5:00 a.m.

Talk about changes. Huh! Years ago it was the groans inside my head which got me out of bed. You know, those 'records' which play those awful, complaining moans, "Gotta do this. Gotta do that. Same old things all day long. Better get started. Hurry. Hurry."

But oh, the changes. I had to let God switch around a few things about me (okay, many) and I had much letting go to do. Like letting go of:

Self-imposed stress
Thinking things must always be a certain way
Expecting too much from other people
Worrying about every tiny thing

Well, you know.

But for the sweet, snappy morning songs? Every small pain was worth the huge joy. 





"...where morning dawns and evening fades, You call forth songs of joy." Psalm 65:8

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