Monday, October 18, 2004

Dread: A Major Life Spoiler



Speaking of Fear-- Dread is Fear's cousin.

Yeah, really.

Think about it. When you're dreading a dentist appointment, you may be fearing that the time in the waiting room will be long and boring like the last time. There'll be no good magazines. The hygienist will nag you about flossing and will take out her problem marriage on your gums. Or the dentist will get a little drill-happy when he fills your tooth. Etc. Etc.

What else do we dread?

How about driving through slow or insanity-prone traffic to work?
Or the long eight or ten hours at work~~the stressed-out co-workers,boss,consumers, patients, etc.? The paperwork? The meetings? The potential problems? The Muzak?
How about carpooling our kids or sitting through their recitals, sports or doctor's appointments?
Or paying bills? Cooking dinner? Cleaning house? Car repairs? Harsh weather?
Or shopping in crowded stores? Paying obscene prices for groceries or gas?
How about waiting in long lines?
Or buying clothes (and those ghastly-lit dressing rooms)?
How about discussing touchy subjects with our spouse? The grumpy neighbor? Or an upcoming visit with in-laws?

If you never dread anything , pour yourself an extra cup of coffee. You deserve it.

Fear is crippling and brings torment. If Dread is a form of fear, then dread brings torment, too. And who wants to spend their daily life being tormented?

Not me.

So years ago I asked God to deliver me from a vague, year-around sense of dread. To alert me when I begin to dread anything. I wanted to enjoy my everyday life because there was so much of it, and I knew I had to fling away anything which would spoil joy.

Now, when I catch myself dreading an upcoming situation, I take myself by the scruff of the neck and say, "Stop dreading things!" Then I purposely think of at least three good things which may come out of the situation, instead.

Examples, you ask?

Well, the time at the dentist office may be just what I need to slow down a busy day. I can spend the time meditating on God's goodness. Having my tooth filled will help me avoid worse pain in the future.
Or my shopping trip may result in a great sale.
Or I may be able to smile at a fellow-shopper who needs a smile desperately (when you've gone through depression in the past, you think of those things).
Or I may discover a new friend at my daughter's recital.
Or I can listen to my new Joyce Meyer cassette while I'm driving in traffic.

The list is endless, one you can expertly add to with practice.

All I really have is Today, and I don't want my Today to be colored grey by dread.

I prefer the light of joyful anticipation.




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Do not anticipate trouble, or worry about what may never happen. Keep in the sunlight.
Benjamin Franklin (1706 - 1790)



Worry a little bit every day and in a lifetime you will lose a couple of years. If something is wrong, fix it if you can. But train yourself not to worry. Worry never fixes anything.
Mary Hemingway



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