Thursday, March 15, 2007
First Impressions--Always Lasting?
For various and sundry reasons, I am re-running this post...
Okay, so you might remember this post where I mentioned Tom's and my addiction to C.S.I.-type shows. But back then, the program, N.C.I.S., was my least favorite (Tom usually watched it alone). Never having been a huge fan of Mark Harmon, I found it annoying to the millionth-degree when he would slap the backs of the heads of his subordinates and talk down to them, like, throughout the whole hour.
Well. Out of all the C.S.I.-type shows we enjoyed when I wrote that post, there is only ONE which I now watch regularly. Guess which one? Yep, N.C.I.S. (Did you guess correctly?) With the others, I just grew bored with their predictability and gore factors and the characters seemed under-developed, as though they ceased to exist outside of their jobs. And although N.C.I.S. probably isn't more well-written than the other programs, the characters have grown on me. I can actually picture who's on N.C.I.S.--as opposed to guessing, "Now, is so-and-so on C.S.I. Miami or C.S.I. New York or is she on Without a Trace or Cold Case?" (Come on, you know you've done that, too.)
The characters on N.C.I.S. make me laugh, even Mark Harmon's character now (who no longer hits his team in the head every single week and has toned his sarcasm way down). Tom has always preferred N.C.I.S. over the others so now we're on the same page there--and that makes it fun.
Okay... I probably went on too long about that--but quickly--my other examples are of first impressions regarding friends. How they are not always the end-all factors we've been told they are.
I had an awful first impression of one of my current favorite friends when she got after me about not paying enough attention to her child during children's church--at a time when I was the only teacher down there in the church basement with 25 kids (wild, chair-hopping ones of every age) week after week. But now she and I are great buddies, the best friend I have nearby.
And one of my favorite online friends and I clashed about some important beliefs while we belonged to an email group, yet now I consider her one of the most interesting people I know--and one of my favorite online friends.
The lessons? Here's some hope if you've made a few bad first impressions, yourself. Not all bad first impressions are fatal (even if society tells you so).
And too, don't be quick to write-off people or tv shows or books or shops--or anything else. You may just be erasing something very special. Something (or someone) you would have treasured if you'd given them a second chance.
P.S. I'm loving the examples you've given me in my comment box about your similar first impressions. Anyone have anymore to share?
"Build bridges, not walls..."